Healing through pain || shivian story

Chapter 6:

A few weeks had passed and siobhon was becoming more drained by the day. Siobhan sat on the edge of her bed, Roger still asleep. The morning light filtering through the curtains, casting a soft glow on the scattered bottles that littered the floor. Each one told a story of a night spent escaping reality, but as she stared at them, she felt a heavy weight in her chest. It was a familiar feeling, one she had become all too accustomed to, the dread of facing another day while battling the urge to reach for the bottle. Roger and her both struggled with the alcohol, it took a different effect on both of them. Each sip numbed Siobhan whilst for Roger each sip angered him.

Today she had to inform staff about upcoming events and changes. As she arrives at work her head pounds, she walks into the staff room meeting the staffs gases.

Siobhan informs the staff about a ratio change allowing them to add more children to capacity. Siobhon thought it was selfish and not a good idea, however she couldn't challenge Roger. She hated this change as the staff were being spread to think as it was but as always she was painted out to be the villain. She walks out towards the car park but is followed by autumn.

A: you are simply signing up too many children!

Siobhan agreed but argued back

S: we have a six months waitlist we are simply trying to get them through the door

A: you mean more money?

Of course she did, Roger was greedy
But again she argued back

S: with more money coming through we can get you the supplies you say you so desperately need

Siobhon honestly didn't care, she was exhausted.

A: we just don't have to capacity

The two quarrled back and fourth until siobhon got fed up and began to walk away

A: I would say send my father my love however.. I hear you two are rather lacking in that department.

Siobhon froze, how did she know. Internally panicking, if Roger found out that people knew she would pay. Her intense thoughts stopped when autumn continued.

A: feel free to send him my indifference instead.

Siobhon calmed down quickly, autumn must of just guessed, after all she grew up with Roger
She rolled her eyes and walked away, she was now in a foul mood.

She walks into the car park and hears a voice

??: Morning!
In a cheerful tone

S: Morning.
Siobhan replied pissed off from autumn. She walked past, she didn't know or care who was talking to her until the women spoke again. Vivian.

V: ooo! Someone certainly got out of the wrong side of the bed this morning!

S: for your information this is just how I always am

V: no it's not, I have been told all about you, Siobhan serpent, former manager at the sister nursey, would walk around with a smirk on her face all the time

Siobhan felt crushed, she has been told. Her one shot at friendship gone. She thought to herself.

'she wouldn't want to be friends anyway you never had a shot, Roger would never allow it nor would she want to. '

S: you've been told have you? So you've made a friend?

V: certainly have, a lovely chap called stephan, I think you know him?

Vivian said sarcastically

Siobhon face drops, so embarrassing. That gay parent, her "homophobic" views, she wasn't homophobic at all. She knew deeper down that she wasn't but-. She cut off her own thoughts and began to speak once again

S: im sure he had some lovely things to say about me

V: he did entilighten me about some of your more homophobic views yes

She was mortified. And began to walk away

V: ever wonder why that is?

Siobhon stops, and stares at Vivian

S: what?

V: well sometimes these views stem from self loathing, the call is coming from inside the house?

Siobhon panicked internally, its like Vivian could see right through her, regardless she continued

S: go physcoanaylise someone else im not in the mood.

V: now now don't go blaiming your mood, just a second ago you said this is how you always are

Vivian says with a chuckle.
Siobhon scowls

S: if there is anything else?

Silence, Siobhan behins to walk away

V: there is one more thing, when it comes to loosing friends and alienating people you clearly wrote the book

Siobhon stops, she is hurt by this, growing up siobhon never had any friends. Even now she didn't. She always blamed herself and now someone else did too? Siobhan felt herself snap and began to shout but was cut off

V: however! I'm new to town so... here is my number if you ever want to get coffee-

She was intruptted by a wave of messages from mr attentive and Vivian walks away to her car whilst siobhon rushes to silence her phone, she looks up to no one.
Roger always does this, knowingly or unknowingly he always ruins any chance of Siobhan having some freedom, tears well in Siobhan's eyes but she is snapped back to reality when Vivian returns with a small piece of paper with her number on "+44 9845 74326 call me x"

V: Siobhan, here is my landline number, we are gonna do this old school, if you ever want to meet up for coffee ring me, I'll be home from 6pm tonight, show up with no mobiles because if I hear that phone ding one more time I'm going to throw it against a wall

They both chuckle

S: thank you Vivian I will call you

V: pls call me Viv! It's what all my friends call me

Friend? Siobhan smiles and holds like piece of paper close to her heart. A friend?
She places it in her pocket and walks towards her car