Healing through pain || shivian story

Chapter 28:

The wedding day was creeping up on them all.

It was the end of the day as she walked into the building, her mind filled with endless thoughts and possibilities. Her expression blank and empty. She felt lonely, all she wanted was the comfort from her colleagues and the one true friend she had, but pushed them away instead.

She walked past the baby room, watching Marjorie and Charlotte talk, locking up the rooms. In the toddler room, winter and sorshca laughing as they cleaned up the mess. Carly outside the office talking to Mia, most likely waiting for Reece to drop her home. Reece and autumn quietly talking as she entered the room.

'Evening' she muttered, she felt drained. No energy to carry a conversation.

'Evening Siobhan, is it ok if we could speak to you for a moment?'

Reece said calmly, a hint of cation in his tone.

'Sure' Siobhan responded flatly, as she bent over the desk, a hand on her hip whilst her eyes focused on the computer in front of her.

'..About the wedding, we know none of your family are going so we wondered if we could help convince Roger to-' autumn said being cut off by Siobhan's cold tone

She glared up at the two siblings stood over her. Siobhan stood up and looked them in the eyes.

'I don't need your pity.' As she walked out into the hallway.

In a small, brightly colored hall, Siobhan stood feeling alone. Out of place. Her arms crossed tightly over her chest, frustration radiating off her as noticed a familiar face. She couldn't help but glare at Vivian, who was pacing back and forth, on the phone.

——————

V: "Mia, the siblings are going to try their best to convince Roger to postpone the wedding and I'll try talking to Siobhan-'

M: I just got a message for aut, she said they just spoke to Siobhan but she stormed out'

V: wait the siblings are here though?

M: yeah? Siobhan is there too, she must be in the hall or something

Vivian peered over her shoulders and met a glare from Siobhan. She hung up the phone to Mia and rushed over to Siobhan.

S: 'I don't need your pity either.'

Vivian's voice pleading awkwardly. "I get what this looks like but- You deserve so much better than this."

Siobhan scoffed, her eyes narrowing. This was the first time they had properly interacted since that night.

Vivian stopped pacing and turned to face Siobhan, her hands on her hips. The stress for Siobhan overflowed "Love doesn't hurt you, Siobhan! What he's doing isn't love; it's manipulation. You're scared, and I get that, but staying with him is only going to make things worse!"

Siobhan's face flushed with anger. Her stone demeanour cracking. "You think I'm scared? I'm not scared! You don't know what it's like. You don't know him like I do."

Vivian took a deep breath, trying to keep her voice calm. "I know enough to see that he's controlling you. You've told me about the things he says and does. That's not normal, Siobhan.

Siobhan shouted, her voice echoing off the walls. "I can handle this on my own. I don't need you or anyone else telling me what to do."

V: 'Siobhan this isn't-'

"Stop it!" Siobhan yelled, her voice breaking. The silence and emotions echoing as she holds up her mask once again. With that, Siobhan turned on her heel, her heart pounding in her chest. "I don't need your help!" she turned around to yell again, her voice echoing as she stormed out of the nursery, leaving Vivian standing there, hot tears slowly spilling.

Vivian watched Siobhan disappear down the hallway, her heart heavy with sadness. She knew she couldn't force her friend to leave, but the fear of what might happen next weighed heavily on her mind. All she could do was hope that one day, Siobhan could be safe with her.

————-

Siobhan sat on the edge of her bed. The dark room consumed her, her lamp flickering shadows that beamed across the walls like the memories she wished she could forget. Roger wouldn't be home for another hour.

She could hear the muffled sounds of the street outside, a world that seemed so far removed from her own. In her hand, she clutched a half-empty bottle of whiskey, the amber liquid swirling inside like the thoughts refusing the leave her mind.

Alcohol had quickly become both her comfort and her curse, a way to escape the pain that had seeped into every corner of her life. She began to reminisce over her relationship with Roger. They had met three years ago, his charming smile and easy laughter drawing her in like a moth to a flame.

At first, he seemed perfect, showering her with affection and promises of a bright future. But as the months passed, the mask began to slip, revealing a darker side that she had been too blinded by love to see.

The first time he raised his hand, it was a shock, a moment frozen in time that she replayed in her mind over and over. "It was just a mistake," she had told herself, allowing Roger to trick her further, trapping her. Siobhan would convince herself that he was just having a bad day. These 'mistakes' became normal, each followed by apologies, a cycle that left her dizzy and exhausted. She found herself constantly trying to avoid the triggers that would set him off, yet these triggers didn't exist, the trigger was Siobhan's presence. He soon dropped the act, showing his true cruel colours, no apologies or affection. Just power and control.

His words cut deep. "You're worthless," he'd sneer, "No one else would ever want you." Each insult chipped away at her, leaving her feeling like a shell of the woman she once was. The bruises she carried on her skin felt like a constant reminder of the love she once felt for him, lost in an instant.

Siobhan turned to alcohol, seeking solace in the bottom of a bottle. It became her escape, a way to numb the pain and silence the voice in her head that echoed Roger's cruel words.

At first, it was just a glass of wine after work, a way to unwind and forget the chaos of her life for a few hours. It soon escalated to whiskey shots before breakfast and drinking alone in the dark, the bottle becoming her only companion. She knew she was spiralling, but the thought of facing reality was far more terrifying than the thought of drowning in her addiction. Trapped in a cycle of shame and denial, much like everything else in her life.

The taste and smell would send memories of Roger's abuse down her spine. Siobhan found herself sitting in a bar most evenings now, the dim lights and loud music drowning out her thoughts. Ordering another drink, hoping to find peace in the haze...