Home

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What really is a home?

I think it's the place you feel most welcomed. Most loved. Most accepted.

For me, that's at my dad's house. 

But I'm rarely there.


I hate it at my mom's house.

Actually, I hate my mom.

And my stupid step dad.


I tried to talk to my mom about my mental health, and she started yelling at me. She said I was normal. That I was completely fine, that I was stupid for thinking otherwise. 

I just wanted help.

A therapist maybe.


And anytime she sees me tic, she gets mad at me. 

She calls me a retard.


She gets mad when I cry.

I don't know why.


When I was little I thought that crying was wrong. Because she'd get so mad.

Now I just hide it. 


I hide a lot.



And my step dad.


My stupid, manipulative, no good step dad.


I hate him.



So much.


For everything he did.


To my mom

To my older sister

To my little sister

To me.


I don't feel bad for hating him.



Because he had to have hated me for what he did.





Sorry.





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