I can't live without you.. || Chanmin

The breaking point

⚠️TW: OVERDOSE⚠️

Days passed, and Seungmin's condition began to improve—or at least, that's what it looked like on the surface. His fever came down, and the swelling in his leg eased with the help of antibiotics. The doctors said he was on the right track, and after a few more days in the ICU, they moved him back to a regular room.

Everyone breathed a little easier, especially Chan. But something didn't feel quite right.

Seungmin was quieter than usual, barely speaking unless directly addressed. Even when Chan cracked jokes or tried to lift his spirits, Seungmin's responses were hollow—an empty smile here, a murmured "thanks" there. Chan chalked it up to exhaustion at first. The kid had been through a lot, after all.

But the unease gnawed at Chan. Something wasn't adding up.

One night, the group came by the hospital room, hoping their presence might cheer Seungmin up. Hyunjin brought snacks, Felix played music softly from his phone, and the others did their best to fill the room with warmth.

Seungmin smiled at the right moments, laughed when he was supposed to—but Chan saw through it. The way Seungmin's gaze drifted to the window too often, how his laugh didn't quite reach his eyes. It wasn't just tiredness.

After the group left, Chan lingered by Seungmin's bed.

"Hey, Min?" Chan whispered. "How are you really feeling?"

Seungmin stared at the ceiling for a long time before answering. "I'm fine, hyung." His voice was soft, distant.

But Chan's heart sank. He knew what "I'm fine" really meant when it came from Seungmin.

"You don't have to be, you know," Chan said, his voice gentle. "You can talk to me. I'm right here."

Seungmin didn't respond, just turned his head toward the window. The pale moonlight cast a soft glow over his face, making him look even more fragile.

Chan stayed by his side until Seungmin's breathing evened out in sleep. Something deep inside told Chan not to leave—but exhaustion eventually caught up with him, and he headed back to the dorm for the night.

He regretted it almost immediately.

---

The phone call came just past midnight.

Chan woke to the shrill ring, his heart pounding before he even answered. Felix's voice on the other end was panicked, breathless.

"Hyung, it's Seungmin. Something's wrong. You need to come back—*now.*"

Chan didn't wait for an explanation. He was out the door in seconds, heart racing as he sprinted toward the hospital.

When he arrived, the hallway outside Seungmin's room was chaos. Nurses rushed in and out, and the sight made Chan's stomach churn. He spotted Felix standing against the wall, pale and shaking, with tear-streaked cheeks.

"What happened?" Chan demanded, fear clawing at his chest.

Felix's voice wavered. "I—he tried to—" Felix broke off, wiping his eyes with trembling hands. "I found him. He tried to overdose. He... he didn't want to wake up, hyung."

The words hit Chan like a fist to the gut.

He pushed past the medical staff and burst into Seungmin's room. His breath caught in his throat at the sight before him. Seungmin lay unconscious, hooked up to monitors and IVs, his skin pale and fragile under the hospital lights.

The nurses worked quickly, adjusting his IV and checking his vitals. One of them looked over at Chan. "He's stable for now," she said quietly. "You got here just in time."

But Chan barely heard her. His legs buckled, and he sank into the chair by Seungmin's bed, gripping the younger's hand so tightly his knuckles turned white.

"Why, Minnie?" Chan whispered, his voice cracking under the weight of his emotions. "Why would you do this?"

The guilt slammed into him like a tidal wave. How had he missed the signs? How had he let Seungmin get to this point without noticing?

Felix stood silently in the doorway, his arms wrapped around himself as if trying to hold himself together. "He left a note," Felix whispered, pulling a crumpled piece of paper from his pocket.

Chan unfolded it with shaking hands.

"I'm sorry. I can't do this anymore. I tried, but it's too much. Please don't be mad."

Chan felt like the air had been knocked out of his lungs. Tears blurred his vision, and his chest ached with a helpless kind of pain. "Why didn't you tell me, Min?" Chan whispered, brushing Seungmin's hair back gently.

Seungmin stirred slightly, his eyelids fluttering open. His gaze was distant, unfocused—but when he saw Chan, something flickered in his eyes.

"Chan... hyung?" His voice was barely a whisper, weak and fragile.

"I'm here, Min," Chan choked out, squeezing his hand. "I'm right here."

Seungmin's lips trembled. "I'm sorry..."

"No, Minnie. Don't you dare apologize," Chan whispered, his voice fierce with love and fear. "You're here. That's all that matters. You're not alone in this—you never were."

Seungmin's tears spilled silently down his cheeks, and Chan leaned closer, his hand never leaving Seungmin's. "I'm not going anywhere, okay? No matter what happens, we'll get through this. Together."

Felix stepped quietly into the room, standing by the bed with watery eyes. "We're here, Seungmin," he whispered. "We've got you."

And in that small, quiet room, surrounded by thepeople who loved him, Seungmin let himself break—and for the first time in along while, he didn't have to face it alone