The Royal Heir - Dancing with my eyes closed

A few deep breaths

I can't sleep that night. I lie awake, staring at the wall of our palace guest room. I'm too riddled with every type of possible anxiety at once for my brain to switch off. Like, what if it all goes wrong tomorrow and I never see Bella again, or I get her back and she's forgotten who I am, or hates me for letting them take me away, and what if everyone's phones blow up and kill us all, and what if I still never see Jen again, and did I remind Chris to feed Squidward before I left Valtoria, and what if Tommy doesn't say I love you back when I finally say it, and did I really throw up in Laura's mouth after too many beers once, or was that just a bad dream? God, what if it was real? Is that the real reason why she finished with me? What if an asteroid hits the Earth...

I feel a warm hand brush my waist. "Can't sleep, blue eyes?"

I spin over to face him in bed, the glow from the moon casting shadows across his heavenly face. "Huh? What gave it away?"

"I can just feel the stress radiating off you," he says, his voice soothing. "Turn back around. Let me rub your shoulders and back."

Mmmm, yeah, that will help. I oblige, and his hands soon find my shoulders. His touch is both firm and tender, and ooooh yes it's helping already.

"You're so tense," he points out.

I let out a long sigh. "Can you blame me?"

"No." He squeezes my shoulders and it's just heaven, even though my mind is still hell. "You're bound to be worried about where tomorrow's gonna go. But whatever the outcome, I promise you, you will get through this, Maxwell. You're strong. So strong."

"No. I'm not strong." I turn around to face him again, his hands remaining on my shoulders the whole time. "But with you here, I don't feel like I have to be." I gaze at him in the darkness, and try to imagine how much darker it would be if he wasn't here.

"Well, I'm always gonna be there, by your side, if you'll have me," he says softly, his hands still massaging my shoulders. "And you are strong. Everything you've been through in the last few years has prepared you for this. Made you stronger. Because..." He pauses, as if unsure whether he should continue, but he does. "If you can get through losing a soulmate, you can get through anything."

I'll never completely get through losing Jen. But I'm surviving without her. And I understand the point he's trying to make. I'll survive tomorrow, because I've lived through worse, and I'm still standing.

"Thanks, Tommy," I mutter, and then I see the tears in his eyes. "Hey, what's wrong?"

"Nothing," he protests, but I hear it in his voice.

"No, tell me."

He sighs deeply. "I don't think I could be as strong as you. If... no. I don't even want to think about how it would feel to lose you, now that I've finally got you."

He pulls me closer, like he's afraid to let go. and I reassure him with soft kisses on his neck and face. "Then don't think about it. Because I'm going nowhere. And we're getting Bella back tomorrow. And then it'll be me, you and Bels against the world forever."

"That's better," he whispers as we snuggle close. Our lips come to rest pressed against each other's, and our legs entangle under the silky sheets. As his warmth wraps around me, I close my eyes, focusing on everything that's good, and feel myself finally getting sleepy.

***

The coronation ceremony is at midday, so we're all up pretty early to get suited and booted. It still feels weird not to be getting Bella ready for the day too, but I'm determined that tomorrow morning I will be. This ends today.