Masefield Avenue: Episode 21,513

Royal Oak Pub

The music in the background

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OLIVER TROUGHTON:
You've clearly put him in a straightjacket, cleave gagged him, put shaving foam round his mouth, and teathered him to the wall.

DR. ROONEY:
It's up to you whether you believe that he's sane. But he was foaming at the mouth.

DEN WILKINSON:
I'm no medical professional, but surely he'd still be doing it.

DR. ROONEY:
You're right. you're not a medical professional. You're a con artist. Remember what happened down Wealdstone.

DEN WILKINSON:
It was Wimbledon, not Wealdstone, two separate places seventeen miles away.

CHARLENE BALDWIN:
I thought i recognised that face.

DR. ROONEY:
Who in the hell are you.

CHARLENE BALDWIN;
I'm glad you used the witness protection to work in your favour, Vaughan Bishop. You robbed my home and florist in Slough.

LORRAINE SMITH:
Bit rich of you to condemn my son when you should have been banned.

DR. ROONEY:
The NHS is corrupt, and it was the 80s when i got my licence they didn't care about my past look at Jimmy Savile.

DEREK HOWARD:
It is absolutely despicable how you got away with it for so long. You were in a position of trust.

DR. ROONEY:
Why would i want to help a druggie like him or some disabled person, i love an audience.

OWEN JARRETT:
Give yourself up, what do you have to gain

DR. ROONEY:
I don't take instructions from a yank. Life doesn't always like it does in Frasier or Seinfield, so stay back, or I'll inject you with this cocktail.

OWEN JARRETT:
I've been shot in the Gulf and Afghanistan, drop your weapon, and fight like a man.

JADE SINATRA:
Don't be a hero, Owen.

PHOEBE HARTNELL:
Oh my god.

DR. ROONEY:
remember me, you Fucking slut. How dare you report me for domestic abuse.

PHOEBE HARTNELL:
It was true. You threw me downstairs and did unspeakable things to me.

DR. ROONEY:
You wanted to try LSD.

PHOEBE HARTNELL:
I never did, but i have no choice when you inject it into my veins.

DR. ROONEY:
Anyway, how did you know i was here?

PHOEBE HARTNELL:
I have a friend here, and a man in Altrincham knew about you because you tried to convert him because he was gay.

DR. ROONEY:
Freddie Humphries, that stupid Gaylord. I'm going to kill that Fag.

KRISTA MATTHEWS:
That's enough. You hurt my dad, and now you're discriminating against someone who isn't here to defend themselves.

DR. ROONEY:
The one that got away, i heard about what happened with the Hayes family. You should have kept a long distance.

(Jeff throws Oliver, his baseball bat, that he hits Dr. Rooney with)

OLIVER TROUGHTON:
You could tell he hasn't been down south, Wealdstone, and Wimbledon is like Sunderland and Darlington.

JEFF MATTHEWS:
Is Southend considered to be in London.

OLIVER TROUGHTON:
No, South-East near to London, but no, London is Landlocked apart from the rivers

JEFF MATTHEWS:
I thought it was seen as Weston-super-Mare is sometimes considered to be Bristol.

OLIVER TROUGHTON:
Because both places share the M4 motorway and have a derby match every blue moon.

(Oliver hits Dr Rooney again, as Gordon enters)

GORDON BOSWELL:
What's happened here?

OLIVER TROUGHTON:
We learned a lot, and i shot up some crack. What do you think happened he threatened to inject us with a cocktail of drugs, so i hit him with a baseball bat.

JEFF MATTHEWS:
You're not taking that baseball bat for evidence. That's my property. You can take the doc, though.

GORDON BOSWELL:
That's exactly what i was gonna do.

JEFF MATTHEWS:
I will repay you, Oliver, and i truly mean that.

OLIVER TROUGHTON:
Breath the moment in Jeffrey, and anyway, i needed Caleb to help me find her. Be lucky i haven't got my son back yet. Good day, Jeffrey.

KRISTA MATTHEWS:
It's great to be back, dad.

JEFF MATTHEWS:
I'm glad to have you back, Krista. i think this calls for Champagne.

(Phoebe, Oliver, and Kathy exit)