vague

halloween

i'm sitting in class
and i've been
here for hours
and nothing
has changed
nothing will

i'm alone
i am always
so fucking alone

people around me
are laughing
and smiling
and talking

and i'm just there
alone, alone, alone

secretly, or not so, i am
hating all of them
even though they're
doing nothing wrong
they're just happy
and i am not
so i blame them

make myself believe
that i hate them
like i hate
halloween

because i'm
so jealous
of everyone
who has friends
to go out with
to dress up with
to just talk to

i've never
had that

i've never
celebrated
halloween
there was just
no one to
celebrate with

i'd just end up
alone in my bed
wishing i could be
somebody else

someone who's
not alone
all the time