Spinning Stars on Her Fingernails (Panic! At The Disco)

Chapter 1: The Beginning of Everything

*Three years earlier*

Okay, let's do this.

I gazed out the bus window as the town passed by in a rush.

There was a cemetery with rolling green hills spotted with gray and black headstones. It struck me as beautiful. It's odd to call a cemetery beautiful, but it just was.

And then we pulled up to my new home for the year. Woodbury Boarding School. The building and campus decorated with blue, white, and yellow.

The bus slows to a stop and loads of new students like me stand up and rush off.

Before getting our class schedules, we got to go to our dorms and meet our room mates.

I open the door to room 336 and see it's empty. I plop my bags on the bed closest to the left wall.

"So I'm guessing you're my roommate?" I turn around and see a pink haired girl leaning against the doorway.

"Yeah. I'm Riley." I walk over to shake her hand. I notice her septum piercing as I get closer. She lifts her hands and shakes mine as she nods.

"Audrey. Course?"

"Creative Writing and Music. You?"

"Music. So you play sports, judging by the two courses?"

"Soccer." I was able to take two courses with a scholarship-thingy, I don't really know what else to call it.

"Ah. Well I can assure you I'm not annoying."

"Uh, cool. Neither am I?" I say as more of a question. She nods and puts her bags on the other bed across the room.

"Let's go look at our schedules." I follow Audrey out of the dorm building to the auditorium where students are crowded inside looking at small pieces of paper.

"Name and Student ID number." A teacher with a pile of papers says as if on automatic.

"Audrey Kitching, 4048." The teacher nods and searches through a stack of papers and handing her one.

"Riley Grace, 8368" I say, trying to remember the number on my letter of enrollment. She searches through the pile and hands me a paper with my name, date of birth, and home address.

The paper shows the mix between Creative Writing and Music classes I have. Every day after class at 5:00, I have soccer practice.

"Well, I say we head back and unpack." I hear Audrey behind me.

I nod and follow her out of the office and back to our dorm.

***

While unpacking, I find my rose gold necklace and open my night stand drawer to put it away. I see a folded piece of paper that says 'To everyone'. I unfold it and read.

'My name's Melanie and I'm not good enough.

I'm not good enough for the world.

I'm too fat.
I'm too ugly.
I'm too weak.

I'm not pleading for attention, I'm pleading for mercy.

I have nothing worth seeing.
I have nothing worth caring for.

You can surely do better than me.'

"Whatcha looking at?" Audrey's voice breaks me from my trance.

"I- I think I just read a suicide note."

It was so dark. She didn't use many words yet somehow put her whole life into it. No wonder it was at this school. It was extremely well written.

"What do we do with it?" Audrey cuts through the silence. "I sure as hell don't want it. That's depressing as fuck." I force a shaky laugh.

"We should probably turn it in." Audrey takes it from my hands and shoves it in her pocket.

"I'll do it. You should probably finish unpacking." Audrey says as she walks out.

***

Monday came too early for my liking.

I tried to dress as casual as possible while still looking questionably good. Turns out that was pretty hard.

My first period class was a part of my writing course. I walked in and saw a variety of kids. Some of them didn't look like they would ever write, but I've learned that there is no look to a writer. They all have different stories and they each know how to tell them specifically.

The only seat open was next to a guy with brown shaggy hair and light brown eyes to match. I sit down next to him awkwardly as he scribbles in his notebook. He doesn't say a word to me.

"Uh, hi. I'm Riley." His head snaps up from his writing and smiles lightly.

"Ryan." He puts his hand out to shake mine.

"So, what are you taking this class for? I mean what kind of writing? Wow, that was confusing. Let me try again. Wh-" He stumbles over the sentence clumsily before I cut him off.

"Lyrics. For songwriting."

"Really? Me too."

"Cool. Maybe you can show me some of your stuff you've got in there one time." I point to his notebook he was previously writing in.

"Woah woah woah, we're not that close yet. This stuff it personal."

I laugh and nod. "I get it. Words can be very sacred."

"Very sacred." Suddenly the teacher walks in and writes his name on the dry-erase board.

"Are you guys ready?" He says first thing as he turns from the board to face us. The room is quiet with confusion.

"Are you ready to take this class? Are you ready to use your imagination? Are you ready to express yourself? If not, then you might as well leave this class now." He says enthusiastically. The room remains silent.

"Good. Now, this may seem very forward, but we're gonna see just how creative you can be. I want you to pick a partner. You two will be writing a poem together on the subject of your choice." A few people sigh in frustration.

"This is just a warm up for the year. It won't be due for quite a while, so it shouldn't be hard. Especially with the freedom of subject. But please, I beg you, use your imagination, be creative. This should be easy with a partner. I'll give you guys a few minutes to meet each other and pick partners, then I'll let you get started on brainstorming." He sits at his desk and the room bursts into chatter and movement.

Ryan turns to face me. "You're the only person I've met in this class. Wanna be partners?"

"I don't know if you can keep up with me." I smirk sarcastically.

"Oh I bet I can." He smirks back.

"We'll just have to see, then."

~A/N: To clear any confusion, the prologue is set after this story takes place. I know it's sort of confusing, but it just kind of foreshadows on the whole story. Also I'm sorry if the suicide note is kind of depressing. Hope you enjoyed.