The War Hammer of Hogwarts - Harry Potter

Parseltongue

Pieck: They're starting a Dueling Club!  First meeting tonight!

Seamus: I wouldn't mind dueling lessons, they might come in handy one of these days.

Ron: What, you reckon Slytherin's monster can duel?

We headed off to dinner.

YN: I'm gonna go, it looks fun.  And knowing Malfoy, he'll be there.  What I'd give to send him through a wall.

And so at eight o'clock that evening we hurried back to the Great Hall.  Falco couldn't come, he had a date, or as he called it, a "studdy session", with Luna.  The long dining tables had vanished and a golden stage had appeared along one wall, lit by thousands of candles floating overhead.  The ceiling was velvety black once more, and most of the school seemed to be packed beneath it, all carrying their wands and looking excited.

Hermione: I wonder who'll be teaching us?  Someone told me Flitwick was a dueling champion when he was young, maybe it'll be him.

YN: Yeah, he'd be a really hard target to hit.

Ron snorted as Pieck shushed me.

Harry: As long as it's not-

We all groaned.  Gilderoy Lockhart was walking onto the stage, resplendent in robes of deep plum and accompanied by none other than Snape, wearing his usual black.  Lockhart waved an arm for silence.

Lockhart: Gather round, gather round!  Can everyone see me?  Can you all hear me?  Excellent!  Now, Professor Dumbledore has granted me permission to start this little Dueling Club, to train you all up in case you ever need to defend yourselves as I myself have done on countless occasions!  For full details, see my published works.  Let me introduce my assistant Professor Snape.  He tells me he knows a tiny little bit about dueling himself, and has sportingly agreed to help me with a short demonstration before we begin.  Now, I don't want any of you youngsters to worry, you'll still have your Potions master when I'm through with him, never fear!

YN: I never thought I'd be rooting for Snape.

Pieck: Seriously.

Ron: Wouldn't it be good if they finished each other off?

Lockhart and Snape turned to face each other and bowed.  At least Lockhart did, with much twirling of his hands, where as Snape jerked his head irritably.  Then they raised their wands like swords in front of them.

Lockhart: As you see, we are holding our wands in the accepted combative position.  On the count of three, we will cast our first spells.  Neither of us will be aiming to kill, of course.

YN: Shame.

Harry: I wouldn't bet on that.

He was right, Snape looked like he wanted blood.

Lockhart: One... two... three!

Both of them swung their wands up and over their shoulders.

Snape: Expelliarmus!

There was a dazzling flash of scarlet light and Lockhart was blasted off his feet.  He flew backwards off the stage, smashed into the wall and slid down it to sprawl on the floor.  Pieck and I were laughing hysterically.  Malfoy and some of the other Slytherins were cheering.  Hermione was dancing on her toes.

Hermione: Do you think he's all right?

YN / Harry / Ron: Who cares?

Lockhart was getting unsteadily to his feet.  His hat had fallen off and his wavy hair was standing on end.

Lockhart: Well, there you have it!  That was a Disarming Charm.  As you see, I've lost my wand... ah, thank you Miss Brown.  Yes, an excellent idea to show them that, Professor Snape, but if you don't mind my saying so, it was very obvious what you were about to do.  If I had wanted to stop you it would have been only too easy.  However, I felt it would be instructive to let them see.