Lotus

Kari - 16: End of the Halcyon Era

“The lotus is associated with purity, estranged love, and the forgetfulness of the past…”

     The next day at school was similar to the day before, except with a different set of classes. Rina listened to the liar complain about how she forgot how to do this, and how she used to do this and that at her old school. During homeroom, her friend from grade school acted resentful towards her. Lindy was busy talking to her own group of friends, as usual. Rina decided to just sit by herself. Realizing that her feeling of loneliness had grown even more overwhelming, she began to cry. Before anyone could notice her tears, she ran to the bathroom in the senior locker room.

     I don’t have anyone here. No one cares about me. They’re all just using me to feel a sense of self-righteousness. They only pretend to care when they see me crying, then criticize me behind my back for crying all the time. It’s not my fault that I’m like this. No one understands. No one knows what it’s like to be me. They all victimize me. They all use me. They all think that I’ll just forget everything and let it all go. They think that the only thing wrong with me is that I’m a crybaby, but they’re all wrong! I hate myself! I hate everyone! They’re all fake! I just want to get out of here! I just want to be with someone who appreciates my presence! I want to be with someone who will make me feel wanted and needed!

     She let out a whimper as tears poured from her eyes. Suddenly, she heard footsteps coming from outside the stall. Rina wished that the person outside would notice that she was crying and knock on the door. However, she knew that this was too much to ask for. The person walked in, used the faucet, and walked back out.

     Rina stepped out of the stall and looked at herself in the mirror. Her face was a mess.

     “She’s so annoying,” said a voice coming from the locker room. “She’s always crying like a little baby.”

     Rina ran back into the stall and hid herself.

     “Seriously, what the hell is wrong with her? She’s so weak. It’s pathetic seeing her cry all the time. She needs to stop.”

     The person and her companion walked into the bathroom.

     “Rina’s always like this. She needs to learn how to be a man.”

     “Fuck you.”

     “What?”

     Rina stepped out of the stall.

     “Are you retarded?” she asked the girl. It was the liar. “Do I really have to repeat myself? I said fuck you.”

     The liar and her friend stared at her in shock.

     “I’m so fucking sick of you. Go fuck yourself,” Rina continued. “You’re calling me pathetic? You make up lies to make friends. You make up lies to get attention and pretend that you’ve done all these things to make yourself look so amazing. But you’re not. You’re the pathetic one. You’re a bully. You’re a fraud. You’re the worst kind of person there is in this school.”

     Rina wiped her eyes and looked at the girl beside the liar. It was her friend from grade school.

     “As for you, you haven’t even stood up for me,” she said to her. “I told you what your new friend here did to me in the past. I tried to be nice to you because I considered you my friend, but you’ve only treated me like shit recently. You only talk to me when it’s convenient for you. You embarrass me and patronize me. You’re not my friend at all. You’re just like the rest of them. You’re dead to me like everyone else.”