REKINDLED || Completed

37

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Thirty Seven
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Pain.

It's what it was that tormented him.

Pain over a girl he might never have a chance with.

He sighed.

Who was he kidding? They were two different people, with two different stories.

He had his life and way out ahead of him, Asher may just have been a distraction.

But it pained him to believe all of that, for he had wanted Asher in the way, in his way.

It was the strangest of desires yet his heart felt at peace with it.

He didn't still know what it was that kept her face in his mind, for days, weeks and months she had become a constant thought subject.

Surely that was in no way normal.

"Lord..." He managed to pray out but words fled him. He felt awry, worse, embarrassed by the mere thought of feeling for her.

Oren relaxed his head on the tree's tough bark, finding anything but comfort.

"I need to know why you brought me here" he pleaded weakly, feeling the words were too heavy.

It was the question that plagued his mind from that very night in the Bean House. A night that changed his life. He hadn't forgotten the innocence in her eyes or the fears that clouded it.

He hadn't known what exactly kept his gaze on her that long but he was certain it was the same feeling. Since the night in the rain, Asher had become the first thing he thought about each day.

He sighed, in a miserable attempt to quieten his thoughts. Hurt swelled in the pit of his stomach as the disappointment he'd felt the night before manifested once more.

She hadn't come.

He pulled his legs to his chest and wallowed in the momentary sadness.

As hard as he tried to shake it off, it proved futile.

"Oren" a voice filtered over to him and he raised his head

"Penny?" His face creased with concern at the little girl before him "What are you doing here?"

"I come around here a lot" she shrugged like it was a suitable answer "Are you alright?"

He managed to smile but it failed "I guess talking to you might help" he offered and the young girl joined him on the grassy field.

It was silent until Penny sighed "Okay, I come here when I feel hurt" she confessed, unable to meet his gaze

Suddenly he got concerned "Hurt? By what?"

Penny played with the hem of her skirt "My parents got a divorce..."

"Penny I'm so sorry..."

"That and, my baby sister is going away. To Vancouver to stay with my grandma"

Oren reached out to pull her to himself, willing to offer the comfort she obviously needed. For some minutes she cried onto his shirt

"It's hard..." She sobbed and his heart broke

"Hey..." He took her face in his hands, meeting her glossy eyes "It's okay"

Those were two priceless words with the most underrated meaning. To him, it was more than a word of assurance, it was a prayer, a surety. A prophecy.

Penny leaned into his hold, her eyes saddened by the grief inside of her "I didn't wish to tell anyone this because... people look up to me at school. I'm the girl with thick skin..." She chuckled sadly "apparently not anymore"

Oren smiled "Strong people cry too, Penny"

"I'm terrible, it's not strength, Oren. It's fear. Fear of ending up like one of those people whose lives turn upside down at an early age"

That struck a chord in him.

"... I don't want that for myself "

He pulled her into his embrace, patting her hair gently "Do you remember what you were doing the first day we met?"

She sat back "Feeding pigeons?"

He nodded "You will be fine"

She opened her mouth to say something but the longer she stared at his smile, the more she believed his words.

"You, Penny, were built with a strong heart. A heart that'll survive whatever comes its way, I'm one hundred percent sure of that"

She sighed and wiped her eyes "Okay"

She looked relaxed a bit and he was grateful.

He on the other hand, not so much.

"What about you? What's your reason for being sad?"

He sighed, not knowing how to come off with this to a little girl. He felt embarrassed already.

"I.. I feel like I'm going after a lost cause" he breathed

"Is it a girl?"

He turned to her, stunned into silence.

Penny smiled "Well my mother always says, to trust in God for everything. He knows what is best for us even when we think we do. That probably includes a partner. He knows the perfect woman for you, so just wait and pray. Pure feelings will come naturally"

Her words went right for his heart.

She looked to him with a bright smile "Everything God has a hand in will surely work out. If she's for you, she'll come around"

He blinked back tears. He didn't know what to call the many emotions that flooded his mind in that moment. "I guess you're right"

Penny giggled "I'm glad I could help!"

He let out a breath, feeling refreshed. Perhaps it was best to leave it all to God's planning.

***