the start of it all.

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might have a few triggers to some people, mentions of suicide and depression are in or are expected to come throughout the story, please be careful.
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"Cassie, wake up!" is the first thing I hear in the morning.

I look around, slowly coming to my senses after being abruptly awakened from my sleep by the annoying yelling followed by a series of furious knocks to my door.

I looked at the bedside clock and see that it's a bit after 12 in the afternoon. Weird, I don't even remember falling asleep.

I start to sit up in bed, still confused as to how I even got to sleep, let alone to this hour, as it was so unlike me to fall asleep in hotels. Normally I wouldn't even blink the whole duration of our trip, only snoozing every now and then on planes, but never between stops.

I must have been more tired than usual.

"Cassie, f.ucking wake up already!" I'm suddenly brought back to reality by the increasing yelling which causes me to fall off the bed in surprise. "Mother fu-" more knocking, "I'M COMING." I finally get up with a huff and go towards my door to see what the fuss was all about.

-------

"I kept knocking on your door, -"

"I noticed."

"I was worried about you, Cas."

"I know, I know. You always are." I mumble as Adam goes on and on about how I had terrified him this morning as he's used to me being up and dandy at an early hour, ready to take on our first task of the day.

He probably thought I'd relapsed or some shit that the doctors had warned him about, that I had finally offed myself like they expect me to soon enough.

Little does he know that I never even thought about doing it, that I never wanted to follow in my families footsteps and end my life like most of them have. Doctor's were just taking 'precautions' when they called to inform him of my 'dangerous state'.

F.ucking bullshit.

"I know Adam, and I'm sorry. Now did you finish the pictures I'd asked you to?" I quickly change the subject wanting nothing more than to stop talking about my state, which he notices but doesn't call me out on, thankfully.

Adam pretends to still be upset as he eats what seemed like a bottomless bowl of cereal. "Yeah, I e-mailed them to you yesterday. Did you not get them?"

"No, I forgot to check." I say sheepishly as the whole situation was so unfamiliar to me. This was so unlike me.

I carry on watching him eat as I always do. Everything looks so tempting, but just the thought of having food in my stomach makes me want to vomit despite not having eaten anything in the past 24 hours.

It was all because of these pills. Doctors insisted that I needed them, totally disregarding the fact that they made it impossible for me to keep anything down without ending up heaving on the bathroom floor within hours. I guess the pills were more important than food to them, to be fair without them I'd probably be in a loony bin by now, where I probably belong most.

-

"You not gonna eat anything?" Adam asks as he finishes up the mountain of food he'd stacked on his plates. "Not today." I sound weak, probably because I am weak, but I hate it.

I know he'll understand though, Adam always understands. It was probably why Boss always signed us the jobs together, because we understood each other well despite only knowing one another for a small amount of time.

It was insane to think that Boss would even let me, an art student that knows nothing about journalism, be a trainee writer for his magazine and on top of it all, let me work with one of his greatest photographers and travel the world with him. Sure it was a no pay job, but the idea was still unreal.

Besides there was always the possibility of him not liking my stories anymore and kicking me to the curb, no damage done to his enterprise. Brilliant, if you ask me.

I have to admit that this job was one of the main reasons for me holding on, traveling the world was always a passion of mine and now I get to do it with a friend, for free. What more can I ask for, really.

-

We were currently in Spain, with an already finished story and 3 more days of exploring ahead of us till the next flight to our next destination.

No one here knew me to judge me, what happened here, stayed here, and that was exactly what I needed.

-

"Alrighty now, I'm gonna hit the pool for a bit." Adam announces as he gets up from his seat, "I'd invite you to come with, but I already know the answer to that." he gives me one of his knowing smirks, making me roll my eyes in response.

"You say that like it's a great mystery that you just solved, I have work to do, remember?"

"My God, Cassie, love," here we go again. "Do you ever not have work to do?"

"I work for fun so no, really, I don't."

"I'm just saying," he says as we walk out of the hotel restaurant and towards the lobby, "You're missing out on some great guys out there, or girls. Whatever floats your boat." He smirks again, this time waving at two girls in bikinis heading towards the pool, they smile back as he winks at them and I make a puking face to show how much I disapprove of his actions. That guy really was a d.ick.

"What?" he feigns offense as I look at him in disbelief, "Not every girl you see is gonna want to f.uck you,Adam."

"Just because you didn't doesn't make it true." He winks at me this time, and it makes me roll my eyes once again this time at how childish he was but he only wiggles his eyebrows at me in what is supposed to be a sexy way.

I love the guy, but he's a d.amn right idiot.

"Like I said, Im'ma be at the waters, hit me up if you need me yeah?" he finally states as he makes his way towards the door that leads to the hotel pool and leaves me alone waiting for the elevator to come.

When it finally arrives, two other girls seemingly a few years younger than me step inside with me. The two girls do not stop squealing the whole time that it almost drives me insane which makes me ask what they're talking about, curiosity getting the best of me.

"Something exciting happening?" I try to sound the most friendly that I can to not look like a creep that wants to stick her nose into people's business, which I mostly was, but they seemed almost eager to be out with it as they both yelled in unison the one sentence that made my heart stop.

"ONE DIRECTION ARE STAYING IN THIS HOTEL!"

well, f.uck.

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hope you guys like ittt and please rate and vote so that I could get a lil bit excited about updating next. I'll update anyways, but like I'd be really grateful if you leave comments telling me what you think.
not proofread.
bye x.

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