Home. More like disgusting place where is no love, place you only get hurt. I opened the outer door, stepping in, I immediately coughed when the strong smell of alcohol got my nose.
"Where the fuck you were?!" my dad shouted.
Why he always have to be so angry? "At school. I'm not even late why you yell?"
"Oh, Chester" my dad appeared to lean on the door frame again. "I thought you were your mom. She didn't come home yesterday, do you know where she is?"
"Probably getting drunk in the bar, like always. She doesn't do anything else" I said and walked to the stairs.
My dad gripped my back and pulled me back. "You don't speak of your mother like that!"
"That's the truth!" I yelled. "She's never sober"
"But that doesn't mean you can speak like that about her"
"And like you care. You don't care about anyone but yourself"
"What the fuck is your problem?"
"You. You're my fucking problem. When you start to see what you've done to me?!" I yelled. I felt so angry.
"It's your own fault you're depressed and the fuck up in this family!" he shouted and pushed me away from the stairs.
"It's your fault!! It's your fucking fault that i'm this! You're a heartless shit!"
That made my dad go crazy. He gripped my chest and roughly pushed against the wall, high enough my feets didn't touch the floor. My eyes widened, heart beated faster and my throat tightened of thought i'm gonna die now.
"Don't ever, ever say that again. Or I swear I will make you suffer, and regret you were born"
"I already do that" I whispered, looking at his angry eyes.
He hit my back against the wall once, and dropped me down. I fell to sit, and my dad walked away to the kitchen. I closed my eyes, focusing on my heart beat that it would come back normal.
While later, I got strenght of getting up and walking to my room. I fell onto my bed, looking at the ceiling, wondering was my father right.
Maybe he is. Maybe I just think everything is so bad. Maybe it is my fault i'm depressed. Maybe this all is just in my head. Maybe this all is just a sick illusion. My life is a big maybe. Everything is fucked up. I have fucked up everything. I blame myself of everything. I'm gonna fuck up everything. In one day, i'm gonna fuck up the friendship between me and Mike. Nothing lasts forever. We all live alone. We born alone, we die alone.
Spending hours after hours of laying on my bed, wondering about reality and daydreaming about better life, the clock hit 7pm. I daydream so fucking much. I have made a better life, better personality in my head, and I wish I could live there. But that is in my head. I'm never gonna get it.
I shook my head, coming back to reality. I picked up my phone, remembering I promised to call Mike.
Ringgg ringgg
"Hello?"
"Hey Mike, Chester here, I promised to call you so.... Here I am"
"Oh Chaz, nice to hear you"
"Yeah.... What you're doing?"
"Uh, just drawing"
"That's cool, what?"
"You know... Dead stuff... Nothing important.... Uhh... Chester, before you called... I.. I was thinking about you"
"You were? What, and why?"
YOU ARE READING
Happy pill
FanfictionChester is depressed and self-harming teenager, who got bad cards in life. He gets bullied in school and abused by his father. He's lost and alone, but what happens when his crush finds him from that dark corner? [Warning: very depressive, drugs, vi...
