Meredith sat in the dim light, the photo album now closed on the table. The grief was like a weight pressing down on her chest, suffocating, unrelenting. She stood shakily and walked to the kitchen, her movements mechanical.
She opened a drawer and pulled out a small plastic bag filled with a fine white powder. Her hands trembled as she set it on the counter, alongside a small mirror and a razor blade. She stared at the bag for a long moment, her reflection in the dark window catching her eye.
"You're supposed to be stronger than this," she whispered, but the words felt hollow.
The voices in her head began to rise again, taunting her, accusing her.
'You couldn't save her'
'You're a failure'
'You're all alone, and you'll always be alone'
Her breathing quickened, her heart racing. She needed the voices to stop. She needed the pain to dull, just for a little while.
Meredith poured a small amount of the powder onto the mirror, her hands shaking as she used the razor to form a thin line. She leaned down, her breath shallow, and inhaled. The sharp burn in her nose was immediate, followed by a slow, creeping numbness.
Within minutes, the world seemed to soften around her. The crushing weight in her chest eased, and the voices in her head faded into a distant hum. Her body felt lighter, her mind detached from the pain that had consumed her moments before.
She sank to the floor, her back against the cabinets, her head tilting back as her eyes fluttered closed. The silence in her mind was a welcome relief, but deep down, she knew it was only temporary. The grief, the guilt—they would return, just as they always did.
For now, though, she could breathe. For now, the storm was quiet.
But even as the calm settled over her, a single thought lingered in the back of her mind: How much longer can I keep this up before everything falls apart?
YOU ARE READING
Drugs
RomanceMeredith meets derek at a bar. They become closer but she doesn't want him to find out about her past. When he does, will he able to help her?
