Dear Diary

Chapter 14

Leo had not said a word since he had awaken, the terrible events from the night before still fresh in his mind. Sarah had come down the next morning to check on him, and when Donny had come over to help Leo had turned away from him, keeping his hurting eyes staring intently away from his brother.
Mikey had tried to approach Leo as well, but was also met with a hard, tense silence. Mikey had quickly left after his failure to talk to his oldest brother, leaving the hurting turtle alone. Leo couldn't bring himself to speak, his feelings of anger and embarrassment, and worst of all betrayal still raw within him.

When he had finally been left alone for awhile, Leo chanced to look around him and saw his family scattered around the basement, all of them chancing glances at him as if willing him to forgive them. But he could not bring himself to face them. They knew everything. Leo's privacy had been violated and his deepest, darkest secrets and thoughts were now public information. He felt physically sick every time he thought about it. Those things were never meant for his family to know.

Leo turned his head away once again, unable to continue looking at the family who he felt had betrayed him so blatantly. He closed his eyes and took a shuddering breath. Everything hurt. His injuries had been jarred roughly last night, leaving his mind hazy with pain. But nothing hurt worse than his aching heart. When he opened the brown orbs once again he saw something out of the corner of his eye. The black journal that had caused so much pain between him and his family sat on the arm of the couch where Raph had left it the night before. Leo hadn't noticed it until now. He desperately grabbed for it, feeling the hard dark binding between his fingers. He gripped the book tightly, staring intently at the deep black cover. Leo sighed shakily and cracked the book open, flipping past the first pages until he came to the one he desired. The dark eyes of Isabel met his and he felt his throat swell up. He painfully moved his hand toward the page letting his fingertip lightly trace over the drawn outline of her jaw and the soft sketch of her lips. The deep hole within his soul began to burn as he looked at her face, missing her just as much as ever.

A drop of moisture fell to the page, spreading through the fibers of the paper and causing a slight smear of the charcoal. Leo quickly wiped the tears from his eyes that had unknowingly appeared. It had been over half a year since she had died and the pain was still as raw as if it had just been yesterday. If only he could have gotten to her sooner, if only he could have saved her, then maybe things would be different, his whole life would be different. Leo closed his eyes, trying to bite back the deep pain.

Flashback

He took a deep breath of cool fresh air, his eyes closed, every muscle in his body relaxed. The soft sound of flowing water trickled past his ears and he sighed in content, letting his mind begin to drift. A loud call from a distant bird pulled him out of his thoughts and he opened his eyes in annoyance. Quiet was something that was hard to come by, even when he was alone in the middle of a virgin jungle. Leo smirked softly to himself and closed his eyes once again, taking another deep breath, relaxing his body and mind, his hands resting lightly on his crossed knees, trying to drown out everything around him.

"Guess who?" a voice from behind him laughed softly. He felt hands fall over his already closed eyes and Leo smiled warmly, immediately recognizing the musical voice.

"Well that isn't hard, you are the only person who knows I'm out here." Leo laughed in amusement, bringing his hands to her wrists and pulling them gently from his face.

"Darn, and I was so hoping to surprise you." She giggled, moving next to him and kneeling down giving him a soft kiss on the cheek.

"You did." Leo said honestly, his heart skipping a beat from the contact of her lips. "I thought you were supposed to be visiting your brother and his wife for a few days."