a poet's attempts at communication

monster

there's this girl that's so familiar
everybody knows her name
but not because she's someone's popular
but because she's someone lame

wherever she goes she receives insults
words that cut deeper than skin
she'll be put down because of something
that she can't control within

she has a dream to one day find
a wife to love more than her pain
a woman to have a future with
no expectations on what to gain

but it's hard to find someone to love
when, to the world, she's a freak
and all you're friends said she's too much
so, inside, it's what she's believed

she has a reputation as
this fragile person— so sensitive
but few people know the truth
this girl... she is dangerous

in the past, she had turned
and whenever angered, the curse would aid
a monster revealed beneath the weakness
a monster, ready to make decay

she has fangs beneath white lips
and beady black eyes deep in her head
a look of murder on her face
and claws that are sharp and stained with red

she used to fight those that were mean
the bullies that hurt her to her core
she used to snarl warningly
until people finally left her door

she has the blood of those cruel humans
from when they turned to their monster forms
she has the scars from all their fights
and the blood from when she would start the storms

she's killed a million in her mind
and harmed enough to fill a room
but these days, no one knows
a good thing they won't meet their doom

no, these days, the only times
that she will turn is on her own
inside her room at 3am
when she knows she's all alone

then the monster will come out
fueled not only by anger, but something more
a pain that's torn her up inside
is now in her monster form

she won't hurt anyone else
but that energy buzzes inside
instead she turns her claws on herself
and tears a hole she cannot bind

sometimes she hopes the pain won't heal
sometimes she prays that it won't end
she wants to feel so much pain
that she can stop it— but permanent

she wants to feel so much pain
that she can tear her heart out— permanent