Yearning for the Outside

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Amelia lounged in her room, staring out the wide arched window at the sprawling gardens below. The sunlight filtered through the glass, casting golden patterns on the stone floor, but it did little to lift her spirits. She traced idle circles on the windowsill, her mind as restless as the leaves swaying in the gentle breeze.

For days, she'd been confined within the palace walls, her father's strict orders following Benjamin's sudden disappearance. Guards loitered in the hallways, their presence a constant reminder that something was wrong. Though no one had outright said it, Amelia knew her discovery of the scroll had set something in motion. The weight of the secrets she carried made her chest ache, but it wasn't just the scroll that occupied her thoughts.

She closed her eyes, exhaling heavily. The forest. She longed to be back there, where the air was crisp and free, where her world felt bigger than the gilded cage she now called home. Her body ached for the feeling of soft earth beneath her feet, the scent of pine and moss filling her lungs. She thought of her siblings—those she'd never met—and wondered if they'd grown up in places like that, away from the cold grandeur of the palace.

Her mind wandered back to that last night in the woods, to him.

Karma.

Her stomach twisted at the memory. The way he'd grinned, confident as always, when he'd stolen a kiss beneath the silver glow of the moon. It was reckless, passionate, and for one fleeting moment, it had felt like everything. She could still feel the warmth of his lips on hers, the electric thrill that had coursed through her veins.

But then there was the truth—Karma, laughing at her expense, his smooth words hiding lies. He'd cheated on her, humiliated her. The reality of it burned worse than any betrayal. That night, she'd felt like a fool, and no amount of charm could undo that. The kiss meant nothing now.

She rubbed her temples, willing the thoughts away. Why do I even care? she scolded herself. She wasn't going to let herself be that girl—the one who forgave too easily, who let herself be swept away by pretty words and empty promises.

Yet, despite her resolve, his voice echoed in her mind. His laugh. The way he said her name like it was the most natural thing in the world.

Her phone buzzed on the desk. Amelia's heart skipped a beat. She snatched it up, her pulse quickening as she read the name on the screen: Karma.

Her thumb hovered over the answer button.

She wanted to ignore it. She should ignore it. But part of her—the stupid, soft part—ached to hear his voice. She hated that he still had this effect on her, even after everything.

The phone buzzed again, the screen glowing like a beacon.

Amelia clenched her jaw, her thumb moving to reject the call, but she hesitated. What if this time he had something important to say? What if—

No. She shook her head sharply. "Get it together, Amelia," she muttered under her breath. "He doesn't deserve another chance. Not after what he did."

The phone stopped buzzing, the screen going dark. She set it down with a sharp exhale, crossing her arms. Her room felt suffocating, the walls pressing in on her with their silence.

Why did everything have to be so complicated?

She turned back to the window, her gaze trailing over the gardens. The world outside seemed so alive, so full of promise. She imagined herself running barefoot through the grass, the sun on her skin and the wind in her hair. It was a foolish fantasy—her father would never allow it—but the craving for freedom gnawed at her.

Amelia pressed her forehead to the glass, her breath fogging up the pane. "I just want to be out there," she whispered.

The phone buzzed again, jolting her from her thoughts. Her eyes flicked to the screen. Karma. This time, he'd sent a message.

"I thought we were good hit me up will ya?."

Amelia's fingers hovered over the screen. She stared at the words, her heart warring with her head.

Don't respond, she told herself. Don't give him the satisfaction.

But the silence of her room felt heavier now, her thoughts spiraling with questions she didn't want to ask. What if he was sorry? What if he meant it this time? She was supposed to have forgiven this time after they kissed In miss mercy's office

She shook her head again, harder this time. "No," she said aloud, as if hearing her own voice would make it easier. She turned the phone face-down and pushed it to the edge of the desk.

Letting out a frustrated groan, Amelia sank back onto her bed, her hands covering her face. She was so tired of feeling this way—trapped, torn, unsure of what to do next. The forest, the scroll, her mother, Karma—it was all too much.

"I need to get out of here," she muttered to herself.

Her gaze drifted to the wardrobe in the corner of her room. Inside was a simple cloak, one she used when she wanted to slip out unnoticed. The thought was tempting—so tempting.

But then she thought of her father's guards, the watchful eyes in every hallway. If she got caught sneaking out, it would only make things worse.

For now, all she could do was wait.

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