me to me | morgan fallen {on hold}

once a cheater, always a cheater

The days passed by quicker than expected. After he left, Kat distracted herself by hanging out with Amara and Hailey and trying out new hobbies. Turns out she was better at crochet than she had expected. But no matter how much she tried to keep herself occupied, her mind floated back to Morgan somehow. He was always on her mind.

The first phone call came from him three nights into the tour.

"Hey you," Morgan grinned from the other side of the line.

Kat could imagine his warm smile and the crinkle in his eyes. She felt like a schoolgirl with a schoolgirl crush as she kicked her feet on her couch, "Hey little rockstar. How are things going on the road?".

"It's exhilarating and insane. The crowds are insane Kat," he said. "I wish you were here to see it".

"I bet you're killing it. I miss you too. I've seen videos on social media and I'm getting fomo," she admitted resulting in a chuckle from Morgan.

She could hear a door shut in the background before Morgan let out a sigh, "We'll figure it out no matter what".

Her chest swelled at his words, and for what felt like for the first time in forever, she felt like she was able to trust him.

And with that the days began to fly by. It had been three weeks since he left and while the calls and texts kept coming, it wasn't enough. She could feel the strain. The demands of the tour were relentless and his schedule left little room for talking.

She tried to remind herself that this was his dream and she knew who he was going into it, that he couldn't be available every second of the day. But it didn't stop the flickering doubts she had when his texts became shorter and the reply time became slower.

It was a typical Friday night when she was scrolling on the couch. His drummer posted an afterparty picture with Morgan in the back laughing with a stunning blonde girl next to him.

Her stomach twisted from her own vicious insecurities as she knew he wasn't the type to betray her trust. Before she could stop herself, the wine was making her fingertips type away on the keyboard.

Kat: you seem like you had a fun night

As if he was waiting for a message, it already showed he was beginning to type.

Morgan: it was a band thing, are you ok?

Kat: it's fine, just missing you

His reply took longer this time as she stared at the screen.

Morgan: miss you too, I will call tmrw

She rolled her eyes as she tossed her phone onto the cushion beside her. She knew he meant well but it obviously meant that he would never call.

The next evening, Morgan did finally call. Kat tried to sound normal but the tension was very prominent.

"Hey beautiful how are you?" Morgan smiled as he picked up, it was clear he was in his bed on the tour bus.

"Hey, I'm fine. How was your night?" Kat asked bluntly. Although it wasn't her intent, her voice harshly delivered her annoyance with last night.

His smile faltered as he began analyzing her, "Is everything okay Kat? What's wrong?".

She plastered a smile on her face and nodded as he rolled his eyes, "Bullshit. Is this about last night? It's okay if it is".

Letting the smile on her face be replaced with a frown, she took a deep breath, "I get jealous but I don't mean to... it's just hard".

Morgan seemed to avoid eye contact through the screen as she tried not to overanalyze his reaction, "I told you I wanted to make this work. You need to get over your insecurities Kat".

Her eyebrows furrowed immediately at the defensive attitude he had and her eyes began to gloss, "You asked and said it was ok. I answered truthfully. You're halfway around the world with random girls who are throwing themselves at you Morgan".

"You don't think I think about the guys hitting on you? I mean you cheated on your ex" he retorted.

Kat's jaw dropped at his low blow of a statement as his eyes widened. As he took a deep breath and processed his own fuck up, Kat shook her head and ended the call. There was no way he just said that. He wasn't wrong but it was a one-time occurrence, it wasn't once a cheater always a cheater. Not in this case. Did he not trust her?

Thoughts echoed in her head and as she watched her phone screen flood with missed calls and texts, she faced it downwards. Observing her stagnant surroundings, Kat felt the dissatisfaction within her. Was she really just going to sit and wait around for him? Would this be her life? She knew she was built for so much more than to be a stay-at-home girlfriend.