tis the damn season

"And i snuck in through the garden gate"

The house was quiet as I slipped out the back door, the cool night air hitting my face like a breath of fresh air. I took a deep breath, trying to steady myself, but the knot in my stomach only seemed to tighten. Everything from dinner—Rose's sharp words, the tension with Rafe's family, the unease from the business talk—was swirling in my mind. But I couldn't shake the feeling that there was something else bubbling beneath the surface, something between me and Rafe that neither of us was willing to fully acknowledge.

I stepped onto the back patio, the sound of crickets filling the space. The backyard was bathed in soft light from the porch lamps, casting long shadows across the grass. I spotted Rafe leaning against the brick wall, his hands stuffed in his pockets. His posture was casual, but there was something about him that was always intense—like he was waiting for something, always ready for a fight, or for something more.

"Hey," I said softly, stepping closer.

Rafe looked up, his lips curling into a small smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. "Hey. You good?"

"Yeah, I just needed a second," I replied, wrapping my arms around myself. "It's been a weird night."

He nodded, pushing himself off the wall. "I get that. It's a lot to deal with... family stuff, business stuff..." He trailed off, his eyes briefly scanning me before he took a step forward. "How's your mom holding up?"

"Better," I said. "But I don't know. It's like... she's too comfortable here. Like she's been here too many times to notice how strange it all is now."

Rafe didn't answer right away, and for a moment, we just stood there in the quiet, both of us processing. The weight of everything—the dinner, the talk of partnerships, the unspoken tension—seemed to hang in the air like a storm cloud.

"You know," he said after a while, breaking the silence, "I didn't ask for any of this. Not the business stuff, not stepping into my dad's shoes, none of it."

"I know," I said, my voice softer now, my gaze catching his. "I don't think anyone did."

He took a step closer, his eyes searching mine. "It's hard, Jules. It's all hard."

I nodded slowly, but my mind was spinning. I could feel the space between us shrinking, that old tension rising again. And despite everything that had happened, despite how tangled I felt in my thoughts and emotions, there was one thing I knew for sure: I didn't want to pull away from him.

"Rafe..." I started, but I wasn't sure where I was going with it. There was so much to say, so much that felt like it was just on the edge of my mind, but I couldn't bring myself to voice it.

He didn't say anything, just reached out, his hand gently brushing my arm. The touch was soft, but it sent a jolt of warmth through me. I looked up at him, our faces so close now that I could feel the heat radiating off his skin.

"You don't have to say anything," he murmured, his voice low, gravelly. "Not yet. But I think we both know there's something here. Something we can't ignore."

I swallowed, my heart pounding in my chest. My breath hitched in my throat as his fingers brushed my cheek, gently tilting my face toward his. For a second, everything around us disappeared. The house. The business talks. The drama of our families. All of it faded into the background.

"I don't want to ignore it," I whispered, my voice barely audible.

He leaned in, his lips grazing mine in a slow, deliberate kiss. It was soft at first, tentative, like neither of us was sure if this was real, if this was something we could do. But as the seconds ticked by, it deepened, his hand sliding into my hair, pulling me closer. A rush of heat surged through me, and I melted into him, the world around us forgotten.

When we finally pulled back, we were both breathing heavy, the reality of what we were doing sinking in. Rafe's forehead rested against mine, his eyes closed as if trying to steady himself.

"I don't know what this means," he muttered, his voice rough. "But I can't pretend it's not happening."

"I don't want you to," I whispered back, my hand trailing up his chest to rest over his heart. "I don't know what it means, either. But I don't think I can ignore it either."

We stood there for a few more seconds, just holding on to each other, the tension between us palpable. Everything felt so fragile—like if we said the wrong thing, it would all fall apart. But at that moment, all I could think about was how real it all felt. How much I needed this.

"I should go back inside," I said, my voice breaking the silence. "My mom will wonder where I am."

Rafe nodded, his hand reluctantly slipping from my waist as I stepped back. "Yeah, me too. But... just know, Jules, that this isn't just some fling. I'm not just looking for a distraction. I want you in a way I can't explain."

The honesty in his words sent a flutter through my chest. I met his gaze, unsure of what to say, but knowing that this was far from over.

"I'll see you inside," I said softly, giving him one last look before turning toward the door. My heart was still racing, but now, it felt like there was something to hold on to—something I didn't fully understand but was willing to explore.

As I walked back inside, the weight of everything still hung in the air, but now, it felt different. There was something new between me and Rafe, something that neither of us could ignore anymore. And whatever it was, I knew it was going to change everything.