Let The Rain Fall Down

Where It All Changed

Six days.

It had been six long days since she'd gone...

Life seemed to go in slow motion, the children were off school for an indefinite period, they didn't want to be there and I didn't want them out my sight. I was waiting for a call from the police to tell me when I could collect Chloe' body, a thought that made me sick and brought back the memory of seeing her body three days ago. I didn't recognise her, the body was a charred corpse, not the beautiful woman I'd known a week ago, the sickness in my stomach rose it's ugly head once more at the memory and the tears threatened to fall. I was tired of crying, tears achieved nothing... it was the actions that got me through the day.

I sat in my office at the grid and stared at the empty desk that had been mine for so long... something was off, I shrugged it off as nothing – my imagination and nothing more... it's just, it looked as if my desk had been moved, the chair was at an angle. It wouldn't have been used, it was surplus to requirement. God damn it, my bloody desk wasn't important. Today was the day. I was going to the crash site, I had to see for myself where she'd lost her life... where my heart had stop beating. I'd planned on letting Dimitri handle this but I had to do it, so I sat... Eloise was in the playpen next to my desk, Aeryn and Caleb were reading and doing homework across from me. I knew the grid wasn't the best place for them but as much as I'd appreciated my parents offer to come down and stay to look after them all, I had to do this myself. I was all they had now, I couldn't leave them, couldn't abandon them when they needed me the most.

'I'll be back, Daddy needs to speak to Uncle D... watch Eloise for me...'

Making my way out of the office, I stared at my desk again... it was getting to me, and I found myself straightening the chair before turning to Dimitri...

'We're going there today whether the idiots at Scotland Yard like it or not...that road must need re-opening soon, it's been closed a week and you know there'll be someone moaning and complaining about time wasters... God forbid someone does a thorough job and gets the answers and finds the bastards that did this.'

He nodded in agreement, not uttering a word, that was one thing I'd noticed the two days I'd been back here, no one spoke to me for longer than needed, I guess people were expecting me to have some kind of breakdown. That wasn't going to happen but it was pleasant to be left alone, at least here – when I was at home the phone never seemed to stop ringing, I'd let the answer machine pick up the calls for the first day and then hearing Chloe' voice on the answer machine every time it rang drove me overboard so I'd ripped the thing out of the wall. We made the calls to Scotland Yard and made sure that they had all of our numbers to let us know when we could collect Chloe, I didn't trust anyone with her body... when she came back to us, it was going to be people I trusted bringing her back.

'Beth will take the children in her car, I know as bad as it is Aeryn wants to go there – she's brought the roses to lay at the side of the road. I've tried arguing with her over it but she's as stubborn as her Mother is... shit... I meant was... Dimitri you and I will go in my car, I want cameras, I want any and everything that will help us get answers goes in that car... go get everything ready, I'll be in the office with the children I need to be there.'

* * *

We arrived at the road a little after two in the afternoon, Ruth had announced she would meet us there, her illness appearing to have cleared quickly and she was fully up to speed on everything. As strange as it seemed I was convinced she seemed to know more than me over what was happening, I knew Ruth Evershed probably better than she knew herself, but I got the feeling I wasn't being told something. Now wasn't the time to push it, I stood in the quiet road, the sound of the traffic on the main road could be heard but to me there was no sound but that of the people around me.