Through the wall

XVII

It was the day of Sammy's final special class, after which Gun hoped to find the peace he so desperately craved. Sammy had made remarkable progress, and her improvements were evident in her daily performance in class. She had discovered that reading opened the door to the world of books and fantasy, which motivated her to push herself further. She loved imagining stories, drawing, and reading. Her skills with numbers had also improved, so she was ready to stop having tutoring sessions.

Good, thought Gun. One less thing to worry about. Deep down, he felt relieved. He needed to distance himself from that family, even though he didn't want to abandon Sammy. The little girl was very important to him, and he knew he would continue to help her if she needed it. He couldn't bear to think how much he would miss their daily moments together. It was hard to explain, but on weekends, he often longed for her hugs and the joy on her face whenever they learned something new together.

That week, he also hoped the agreement signed with Sing's mother would be finalised, which meant he'd soon have no more excuses to keep seeing Off.

Off... his feelings for him had already become a problem. Off kept treating him with such care and saying things that confused him. Gun had an overwhelming urge to hug him, to hold his hand, to kiss him... as if those were the logical responses his body needed. It felt like they were a couple, even though they weren't. This whole situation made him feel increasingly unsure of himself; he couldn't shake the impression that it was all in his imagination, born out of his desire to be with Off, and that thought hurt him deeply.

When the class ended, Gun walked hand in hand with Sammy towards the school car park, where Off always waited for them in his truck. Seeing them approach, Off stepped out of the vehicle and came to meet them.

"Daddy! Josh has a kitten! They found him with his mum. His name is Kito. Can we adopt a kitten too?"

The girl had run to her father as soon as she spotted him, full of excitement at the idea of having a pet. She couldn't stop talking about it. Off picked her up in his arms and replied:

"Honey, we can't take care of a kitten right now. Daddy's got too much to do, and I've never had one before. How about we wait until you're in Year 2, and then we'll talk about it again?"

She looked up at him with big, expectant eyes.

"But Daddy, I really want a kitten. I could ask P'Gun to help me and teach me how to look after it. He loves kittens—he had one when he was little, just like me!"

She was on the verge of pouting and Off knew how hard it was to set boundaries when she did that. So, he decided to use his usual evasive tactic, planning to revisit the topic when he felt more prepared to say no.

"Okay, let's talk about it later. Gun needs to get home, and so do we. I don't want to keep him waiting. Hop in the car, alright?" Off set her down, and she happily climbed into the back seat, convinced they'd pick up the conversation later. He then turned to Gun and gave him a playful wink.

"You're not going to let her have a kitten? They're not much trouble, and they make great companions for kids," Gun said, unable to resist supporting Sammy's cause.

"Honestly, I don't know the first thing about raising animals, and I don't want to mess it up..." Off looked down, as if unsure whether to continue. Finally, he decided to press on, his tone a bit awkward. "Maybe, in the future, someone who loves cats might want to share their life with us, and we'd end up getting one... you never know where life might take you."

Gun froze for a moment, but quickly composed himself, hiding the sadness and pain that Off's insinuation brought him. As if his unrequited love and the man's confusing behaviour weren't enough, now he had to endure Off talking about wanting to find someone else. It was too much—he felt like he was reaching his breaking point.