Through the wall

XIX

Gun settled himself on Off's lap, facing him. The kiss grew deeper by the second, and they both felt each other's excitement and warmth as their hands roamed with fervour. Suddenly, Off gently pushed him back, leaving a soft kiss on his lips.

"Does that mean 'yes'?" he asked, his breath heavy and voice low. Gun loved hearing him speak like that. He adored how Off, to the outside world, was a smart, harmless nerd, but when they were alone, he turned into someone so primal and dangerous. That duality drove him crazy, in a way he couldn't quite put into words.

"Yes," Gun replied, his voice shaky as he tried to catch his breath.

Off looked straight into his eyes, as though searching for something.

"Thank you," he said, before kissing him gently and pulling him into another embrace. Gun couldn't resist and kissed him again, but Off, ever so gently, cupped his face in his hands to pull him away, looking at him seriously.

"You know," Off began, "I think we should cool down for now. The doctor said I need to keep an eye on Sammy, and this... isn't exactly doing that. Trust me, I'd love to keep going, but I can't."

He paused to kiss Gun's lips quickly, only to stop when he saw him pouting and clinging tightly to him.

"What's wrong? Are you upset because I need to look after Sammy?"

Gun didn't lift his head and clung to him like a limpet. Off couldn't understand how the same guy, who moments ago was practically tearing his clothes off, had suddenly turned into this adorable little bundle refusing to let go.

Without looking up, Gun began to speak.

"How could I possibly be upset that you want to take care of your daughter? Sammy is your daughter, and one of the things I admire and respect most about you is the way you look after her. Besides, I love her too."

Off tilted his head back and bit his lower lip, gazing at the ceiling. He was utterly lost for this boy. He couldn't believe Gun had said yes, that they were officially boyfriends. As he gently stroked Gun's head, he asked tenderly:

"Then, what's the matter?"

Gun's voice was uncertain when he replied:

"Every time we kiss, you stop talking to me afterwards. I'm scared that tomorrow, you won't want to see me anymore."

The boy held him even tighter as he said this, and Off tensed. He immediately felt a pang of guilt; he hadn't meant to hurt him, but now he realised how much his behaviour had affected Gun.

He placed his hands on Gun's shoulders and pulled him away slightly to look him in the face. Gun was visibly embarrassed and avoided meeting his eyes.

"How about you look at me?" Off said, his tone soft but firm. Reluctantly, Gun raised his gaze.

"I owe you an apology for that," Off began. "I acted like a jerk. I judged you unfairly and never gave you the chance to explain yourself or tell me how you felt. I made a lot of mistakes, and I regret them. But I want you to know something: you're important to me, and I'll do my best—with all my heart and brain—to take care of you and appreciate you as you deserve. I might mess up because I'm pretty clueless when it comes to love, and my past experiences haven't been great, but my intentions will always be good. And if I screw up, I'll make sure to chase you around the house on my knees to make it right."

Gun managed a small smile at that and Off felt a surge of satisfaction at seeing him smile.

"Oh, and one more thing before I head upstairs—because I already feel like I've earned the title of Worst Father in the World for leaving my daughter alone—I never said you had to leave. Just that I can't be distracted doing other things. Stay, and come upstairs with me to look after Sammy."