Starting Again (A Charles Leclerc Fic)

049 : Canada Aftermath

Charles stormed down the corridor of the hotel, his heart pounding in his chest, each step echoing with a mix of regret and frustration. The air felt thick with tension, and he could almost hear their argument still swirling in his mind. Just moments ago, he had watched Katrina's face crumble, the tears glistening in her eyes carving lines of guilt into his soul.
    "Damn it!" he muttered under his breath, his fists clenched at his sides. As he turned a corner, he nearly collided with Max Verstappen, who stood there, arms crossed, a scowl etched across his face.
    "Where do you think you're going?" Max shot, his voice low and sharp, like a blade cutting through the air.
    "Out of my way, Max." Charles brushed past him, barely sparing a glance. He could feel the heat of Max's glare burning into his back, the weight of unspoken words hanging heavy between them.
    "Did you even think about how she feels?" Max's voice followed him, rising in anger. "Only the two of us knew how hard it was for Trina to be here, You really messed up this time, Charles."
    Charles halted, turning slowly, his chest heaving. "I didn't mean to hurt her! You think I wanted this?" The frustration bubbled over, and he took a step closer, his hands balled into fists at his sides.
    "Then fix it," Max snapped, the intensity in his eyes unwavering. "You owe her that much."
    With a sharp intake of breath, Charles pushed past him, the confrontation only fueling the fire of his anger. He reached their hotel room, the door slightly ajar, and he hesitated for a heartbeat before pushing it open.
    Katrina stood in the middle of the room, her back to him, shoving clothes into her suitcase with a vengeance. The sight of her packing sent a jolt of panic racing through him.
    "Katrina..." His voice softened, but the tension in the air crackled like static.
    "Just leave me alone, Charles. I'm making your wish come true, I am leaving you alone now." She didn't turn around, her voice steady but edged with pain. "I need to get out of here."
    "Please, don't do this." He stepped further into the room, the door clicking shut behind him. "We can talk about it. I didn't mean what I said. I was just—"
    "Just what?" She spun around, her eyes blazing, the hurt evident in the way her lips trembled. "You were just being an arrogant driver who thinks he can say anything and I'll just forgive you?"
    "I'm not that guy, and you know it!" His hands gestured wildly, the frustration boiling over. "I was being stupid. I didn't mean to say all of those things. Mon amour please forgive me. I dont want you to leave me"
    She crossed her arms, her expression hardening. "But you did, didn't you? You made me feel small, like my feelings don't matter. And now you want me to just forget about it?"
    "No, I want you to understand!" He stepped closer, his voice dropping to a whisper, almost pleading. "I was stressed, and I took it out on you. I'm sorry."
    Katrina turned back to her suitcase, zipping it up with a finality that made his heart sink. "Sorry isn't enough, Charles."
    "What do you want me to say?" He ran a hand through his hair, feeling the weight of the world on his shoulders. "I'm trying here. I love you, but the pressure... it gets to me."
    "Love isn't supposed to hurt, Charles." She paused, her voice trembling. "It shouldn't feel like I'm constantly walking on eggshells around you. I can't do this everytime you have a bad race. I'm already anxious about your safety, I don't want to add this to the things I have to expect each race"
    He stepped forward, closing the distance between them. "You're not walking on eggshells! You're the one thing that keeps me grounded. I can't lose you over a stupid fight. I can't lose you because of my stupidity please don't leave me"
    She looked at him, her expression softening for just a moment before hardening again. "Maybe you should have thought about that before you opened your mouth. This wasn't the first time we had a problem about your words Charles."
    "Don't say that! You know that I never wanted to hurt you" Desperation laced his voice, and he reached for her arm, but she pulled away.
    "Then why do I feel like this? You're racing every weekend, and when you're not, I'm just... there. I know your priority is racing and I understood and respect that. I came here with you to support you. We were doing so fine with all these races Charles, but the moment things didn't go well, I am the only person you took it out on"
    He sighed, running his fingers through his hair again, trying to find the right words. "It's not like that. You have to know how much you mean to me. I'm trying to balance everything, but it's hard."
    "Hard? Try being the one waiting. Try being the one who's on the other side of the garage. You remembered how helpless you felt in Korea? Charles that was me when I was watching you race earlier. All I wanted was to comfort you and be there for you but you took out your frustrations on me and not on your team." She turned away, her eyes glistening with unshed tears. "I need to go back to Monaco, Charles. I need to breathe."
    "No, please." He stepped in her path, desperation clawing at his throat. "You can't just leave. Not like this."
    "Why not? You think I owe you something?" Katrina's voice cracked, and she took a shaky breath. "I can't keep doing this. I am not your oral punching bag."
    "Then tell me what to do! Tell me what I have to do for you to please stay" He felt the walls closing in, the fear of losing her gnawing at his insides. "How can I fix this?"
    She looked away, blinking back tears. "I can't stay here and pretend everything is okay."
    "Don't go, please." His voice dropped to a whisper, the plea resonating in the silence of the room. "I can't imagine life without you."
    She hesitated, her suitcase half-zipped, the tension thick enough to slice through. "You say that now, but what about tomorrow? What about the next race? Can you promise that when you finish last or dnfed the race? Would you guarantee me that you wont take it out on me the moment something didn't go your way?"
    "I'll change! I swear I will." He stepped closer again, his heart racing. "Just give me a chance to prove it."
    Katrina shook her head, tears finally spilling over. "Proving it takes more than just words, Charles. It takes action."
    "Then let me show you." He reached for her hand, but she pulled away, her expression a mix of sorrow and resolve.
    "I need time." Her voice wavered
"Are you breaking up with me?" His tears were falling freely from his face as he dread her answer
"No mon amour. I won't ever break up with you about this. I just need time to process this and calm myself."
"Will you still be here for the next race?"
"I can't promise anything yet"
"trina..."
"Please Charles, I don't want to argue anymore. I hope you would respect my request for now."
"Do you have to go right now?"
"Yes, I already booked a flight home"
"Can I at least send you off?" He asked helplessly, raking his already messy hair.
"You don't have to-"
"I want to Trina"
"You don't have to Charles. Alex and Lily already planned to drop me off"
"Trina I knew I fucked up. I want to respect your wish but please let me at least drop you off to the airport. I don't know when I will see you again. I can't fly to Monaco because we need to fix and check everything that went wrong today. I know I am asking a lot but please let me do this for you trina."

Katrina felt the desparation in Charles' words. She looked at him and saw how empty his eyes looked. He was visibly tired from the grueling race. As hurt as she was she didn't have the heart to inflict the same kind of pain to him. Max' advice from when they first fought came to her mind. In his profession were concentration is really important, he can't be distracted while driving. She nodded at him and called Alex to cancel the carpool they arranged earlier.

Charles reluctantly helped Katrina load her luggage in his car. The car ride was silent, nobody wanted to break the thick silence. They reached the airport quicker than what Charles would've wanted.

"I guess this is it. See you when I see you" Katrina said sighing

"Mon amour..."

"Charlie, right now I am still hurt but it doesn't mean that I don't love you anymore. I love you so much Charles... I love you a lot in ways I can't begin to explain. I am not breaking up with you over this, I just want to go home."

"Promise me you'll join me again during race week once you're okay"

"I will Charles. Drive safely Charles, don't be distracted while driving. I'll be watching you at home"

"I love you Katrina"

"I love you too"

"Can I ask for a hug at least?" he asked hopeful.
Katrina leaned in and kissed his lips before hugging him.

"Bye Charles"