Belief

7.2

If you've never seen the Disney movie Tangled before (aka the best princess movie) go on YouTube right now and look up 'At Last I See the Light' and tell me it isn't the cutest, most heart-warming scene ever. Plus it will come in handy later in this chapter. So go do it.

Maddie's POV

There are always those inescapable voices in the pit of your stomach trying, feverishly trying, to warn you of approaching danger, of your fears nearing you. These voices that our mind muffles, our consciousness pushes into the dark in hopes that the voices are false, in hopes that our gut feeling is wrong. Denial; when your hopes push away the muffled voices of warning and create an illusion in your mind that everything is normal. Denial; what kills us worst in the end.

My little voices of caution have long since given up on me. I have silenced and broken them too many times that it is natural for me to push them away, and nearly impossible for me to hear them even if I tried.

"One week left and then we are done," Grace repeats to herself as she shoves another exam prep book in her face. Finals, or rather AP tests, are next week. After we finish them, the last month of school is basically movies and getting ready for graduation.

"Stay strong team," Jonah laughs, sliding his finished review packet over to me so I can study from his notes. Yes, Jonah and I are friends again. We've been friends since grade school. Being the gentleman that he is, Jonah showed up to the house one day last month and apologized for the last time we talked. His whole 'coming onto me' thing was highly unlike him, and according to him was a result of catching his almost-girlfriend making out with his brother. I forgave him. Heartbreak makes us do crazy things, and I am not one to judge considering heartbreak made me make out with Calum once. I shudder at the thought. "Just think, after exams is prom and then graduation. It only goes up from here."

"Because prom will be so fun," I roll my eyes. Nothing better than showing up dateless to your senior prom. The boys have a show that night in Atlanta.

Jonah looks confused at first until realization slowly crosses him. "Hey, you could go with me, like as friends? It can be like an 8th grade formal part two," he laughs remembering our middle school formal dance in which we awkwardly danced together.

"That does sound tempting, but I expect a full out promposal or else the answer is no," I laugh, throwing my eraser at him.

"Fine, it will be when you least expect it," Jonah shuts his textbook. "What about you Grace? I can get Bryce to ask you." Referring to his best friend, who is also a part of our little circle of nerds.

"I'm just taking my brother, he is a sophomore," Grace shrugs. Her little brother Nate was actually a stud in his grade. A sophomore on the varsity soccer team, with the windswept surfer hair and flashy smile.

My phone buzzes, a text from Luke.

Hope school isn't too sucky today, we are in France, it is so pretty here you'd love it :-)

I can feel Grace staring at me. "What?" I look up at her after sending a reply.

"Really? Another text? When is the last time he called you Maddie?" Grace shakes her head, putting her books into her bag.

"I dunno, last week?" I mumble, looking down at my phone in my lap, hoping for a reply, hoping for an actual conversation, but knowing that one text is all I will get until tonight.

"I don't know how you do it." Grace stares at me, "Mikey calls me every day Maddie. Ashton calls you everyday Maddie. Don't you see there is something wrong there?"

"He is busier than them, okay? Just- I can handle it." I get up from the table in the library and leave without saying goodbye to them. Slamming my car door shut I rest my head against the window, not sure if I want to scream or cry so I just stare at the empty parking lot instead. Maybe Charlie is right, being emotionless is a lot easier.