Mesmerizing (killua x black reader)

Chapter 33

On the plane

Gon, Me, Killua.

That was the order you sat in. Gon was in the window seat, you were in the middle and Killua sat on your right.

There was a moment of silence while the woman was giving instructions and other stuff that you didn't care about. Gon was side eyeing the hell out of me. I knew that he knew about me and Killua.

Killua was on the other side of me playing with his hands. I was still surprised to have snuck a knife on a plane. Can I kill him?

"The opposition seems to be really good" Gon was first to speak, catching a glance from me and Killua.

"You been watching those clips?"
"Yeah"
"Stop watching them"

"Aren't you supposed to watch clips of the other team to find out their flaws" Killua spoke up. Gon looked me up and down, and I honestly didn't want to answer him.

"We win every game, and the only reason we lost one was because you let them get in your head by watching videos" I say pointing my thumb towards Gon.

About two years ago we lost to the stray kids . The only reason we lost was because they got in gons head, making him think he was just a plant when really he's a tree.

"There called the Chimera Ants" he said, shivering at the word ants  "So what? They're small?" I asked. I mean you call yourself ants, what are you 4'11?

"They're all about 6 foot, on woman's side too" he said. "What!?" I turned my body towards him. "Yeah, but for the men they got this one dude who's like 5'11, I think the names Minato or something like that"

Playing basketball with 6'0 woman and up? Hell nah. After a minute of me staring at Gon in disbelief, I heard a small chuckle from behind me "You loosing to 6'0 woman?".

Hearing that I turned towards Killua. Despite what I was gonna do. Despite my anger, sadness, and -

"Hell nah, both teams will win"

"You not six foot"

"But I can surely hand them their ass like I did to you". After saying that, I faced forward to the seat in-front of me. We land in green island, take two days to get right with the time then play, win and vacate.

That's the plan.

SIX HOURS LATER

Surprisingly,
You were having an actual conversation with Killua, while Gon slept on your shoulder. "Deep Question number four," you read from your phone. "Do you think the concept of divine masculine and feminine are relevant in today's world? If so, how do they influence our understanding of gender and identity?"

You didn't think he'd give much of a good answer given his other odd answers. Sometimes you did even answer the questions because you didn't know how to.

"I don't really think its relevant in todays world with most people, i feel like that's something you go within to find although most people look at it in relationships." He paused and looked at you, making you hold his gaze before saying "I think men should start to embrace their feminine side even if they are males, so they can get a perspective the divine feminine and masculine in a relationship"

Oh.

"That's type shit fr" you said, nodding your head.
He definitely thought long and hard about his answer. We'd been talking for 3 hours and this is the most he's said out of those three hours.

"Alright, next question" he said "What is yearning and should it be brought back?".

You took a moment to think, ignoring Killua's blue eyes as they analyzed the side of your face. "Yearning is the souls deep, a silent whisper, a tender ache that stirs the heart and awakens the spirit. It is a longing for something more, a desire that transcends the mundane"

You tried to glance at him. but your eyes met again, it felt like an electric current passed between both you. A warm, twisting sensation fluttered in your stomach as he held your gaze, the world fell into pieces with each passing second.

"What?" You said, softly. His eyes drop to you lips then lip back up to your eyes. "I've missed you"

"Me too"

"I know an apology can't fix anything I did, but I know I shouldn't have went off with that girl, I should've made my intentions clear with you and her" he started to crack his knuckles, you could see to sweat forming on his forehead.

That same anger found you and reminded you of having a knife in your hand. What if I kill this man on a plane? Why are you thinking about killing a man? A man who you used to love, who you still love.

There a log in your throat. Confession. You wanted to tell him. Tell him you were going to kill him and burn the hope of redemption he has of getting back with you? No...

I'll lure him in close so I can steal what's in the house of his. But what of monic? God monic. Maybe I should tell Gon.. he's delt with deep shit, maybe he'll know.

"So, I was wondering if we can start over..as friends of course"

Kiss him. "Yeah, that's probably for the best. I still couldn't believe you kissed that girl" you smirked at him.

"Technically, she came onto me but I guess it's my fault to, along with you being all buddy buddy with that girl" he looked you up and down.

I want him in my position. I want to make him jealous again. I want...  I don't know what I want anymore

TING!
Message notification from uncles known
So when are you gonna kill him?

You quickly shut your phone off, before he can even glance at your phone.

Yearning is the bridge between what is and what could be, a beacon of hope that guides us through the darkest nights.

To be continued