Oyama: Her Story

CHAPTER 64

We went to James and although he was extremely mad at the fact that Lucas is now involved, he let it slide when I said, ‘I’m expanding, because I can’t be a delivery boy for long. I need to eventually buy a Brick from him, to move so I can make even more money and get out of the game’. After I put it like that, he got less mad, but hey you learn and you live you know.
I thought about what James said about Ase and I made a decision about that the minute we got home and hid the money.
I sent, Kim and Katleho both a text that read, ‘I can’t do this anymore’.
I switched off my data, because I was not gonna let that shit disturb me, or have me explaining myself to a bunch of girls who have boyfriends, I feel like they forget the part where they have Boyfriends.
“I know hore, the money you making is a lot so we can buy a Taxi” says Lucas.
“Ja” I reply.
“Mara mfana, when we make enough, we need to buy a Citi Golf”
“Waistsi mfana, shapa stance”
“Shapa stance” he replies.
I smile, “You know, I always got your back right” he says.
“Yeah” I nod, “Re tlo phopa mfana”(We gonna make it bro) he nods.

Its break time and like James said its time to be a man, “Ejoh, ere ka buya”(I’m coming back) I say walking away from my brothers.
I walk down the field and walk to where Ase is standing with Omontle and Reneilwe, I walk up to her and stand in front of her, she looks at me, “Can I talk to you?”
She’s about to answer me, “She doesn’t wanna talk to you” Reneilwe interrupts.
“Yoh Reneilwe, Reneilwe o dula obulela draada waitsi, nko eme please”(Reneilwe you always talking shit, you know that, just calm down) I turn back to Ase, “Can I please talk to you? If you say no, I’ll understand”
“Ere no, Chomie, hana chomie, hana, HANA”(Friend say no, say no, say no) says Omontle and Reneilwe.
“Ka buya”(I’m coming back) she says, and folds her arms and starts walking, I walk behind her, my hands behind my back.
I turn to look back at Reneilwe and Omontle, I stick my tongue at them and walk with her, quietly behind her.
She stops abruptly and I bump into her, “Sorry” I say.
She turns around, “What do you wanna talk about?” she asks.
“Uhm” I hesitate, she gives me the, ‘Spit it out’ expression.
“I’m done” I say stuttering.
Her eyes frown in confusion, “Done with what?” she asks.
“I’m done with this situationship man, I wanna be your fucking man, I wanna wake up in the morning and the first thing I do, is send you a, ‘good morning’ text” I say, “I wanna be yours, I wanna have you, I want you to do that blinking rapidly thing you do at me, whenever I say something you don’t understand” I sit down on the steps, and rub my hands, I don’t know why but this is harder than I expected.
“I don’t deserve you, I really don’t, but being in this situationship is poison to my heart, I just never realized how painful it was” I say.
Ase stands there, her arms folded, staring at me like she’s trying to figure out if I’m serious or just spitting game. I keep rubbing my hands together, nervous as hell, waiting for her to say something—anything.
After what feels like forever, she finally sighs and sits down on the step next to me, leaving a small gap between us.
“You’re serious about this?” she asks, her voice softer now but still cautious.

I look at her, “I’m serious, dead serious” I say looking straight into her eyes, “I know I don’t deserve a chance, shit if I was me, I wouldn’t give me chance” I look straight ahead, “But I’m asking for you to take a chance and I will show you, what kind man I am, not the boy you had a fling with 6 months ago”
Ase takes a deep breath, her gaze fixed on me, her expression unreadable. She doesn’t say anything immediately, and the silence between us feels heavy, like the weight of every mistake I’ve made is pressing down on both of us.
My heart is pounding in my chest. I’m not sure if I’m about to be dismissed or if there’s still hope.
She turns and looks at me, “What happened to Kim and Katleho?” she asks.
“I’m done with them”
“Are you done with them, or are they done with you?” she asks.
“Fair enough, but no, I’m done, I’m putting it all on red” I say.
“How will I know you won’t treat me like them” she asks, “That you won’t just say you’re done”.
I release a deep breath, “I don’t know” I say.
She looks at me confused, “You don’t know?”
“I’m not gonna lie to you, this is the first time, I’m doing this” I chuckle my voice a bit shaky. “Doing what?” she asks.
“Putting my heart on the line”
She moves back, “What do you mean, you have talked to girls all the time”
“Yeah” I say nodding, “But neither of them, have ever been allowed into my heart, the only woman I ever loved correctly was my mother”
She looks at me more intently, and breaths in deeply and out and shakes her head, “How many brothers you got?” she asks.
I look at her with an expression that says, ‘Excuse me’ “Sorry?” I ask.
“How many brothers you got?” she asks.
“3, you know them, what’s going on?” I ask.
“Ayy, I don’t know this new you” she says shifting back, “You could be someone different entirely” she says, “So what’s your favorite color”
I look down and shake my head, “Uhm, Black”
“Interesting fact, Black isn’t a colour”
“Really?”
“Yes, it’s a shade” she smiles, “So try again”.
“Mh” I nod, “What’s your favorite colour?”