Into the Ocean

Prologue

I was reading in my room when I started to hear my parents argue. Great here we go again. It was almost nine in the evening. Their voices started to rise and I heard glass breaking. I was so used to it; it didn't even worry me anymore. I hated when they got like this, I had to live with this for seven years now. I couldn't handle it, not tonight. My day was already bad, as it is every day. I just couldn't wait until I finished high school for I could get the heck out of here. The chaos continued.

"That's it! I need some air!" I grabbed my car keys and quietly slipped out the back door. It was raining which was fine it helped me breathe better anyways. I entered my car with a heavy sigh. Why does my life suck so much?

"I'm so tired Emmie." My throat started to tighten and my eyes got watery. Emma was my younger sister. She was only ten when she died. It was in a car accident with my father. He survived and turned to alcohol to avoid the guilt and grief. After her death nothing was the same between any of us anymore. I held on to the pendent around my neck. Emma was wearing it when she died. It was a beautiful sapphire gem. She used to wear everyday and it made me feel closer to her.

"Oh Emmie, I'm so tired of my life. I can't do it anymore!" I started to cry harder now. Wiping my tears away I started the car and drove off. I tried to breathe in deeply to calm myself down. Every night after Emmie's death, I dreamt I was running. I ran and ran, away from something I couldn't even see. Then as I started to run faster I started to fly. And away I went, away from it all. I loved this dream because flying felt like freedom. As I flew the darkness in my life left me, my heart grew lighter as if it were shedding all of life's burdens and sorrows.

Now in my waking life I learned how to reach that feeling, or at least the next best thing; and it was through speed. Whenever I start to feel overwhelmed I jump in my car and drive, trying to get away. As I drove with my heart feeling heavy again, I pressed harder on the gas. I sped down the road as fast as I could, and the rain poured down harder now thumping on the car window and roof. As my breathing got deeper I calmed down and closed my eyes, and slowly the outside world was fading. A couple seconds later I started to see a bright red light through my eyelids and I heard a long honk that sounded so distant, and by the time I opened my eyes and the sound became clearer, it was too late...

~~~~~

"Oh Milah! Milah! Can you hear me honey! It's me sweetie! Please, please wake up. Don't leave me. I can't lose you too. Please."

I could faintly hear my mother speaking, she was sobbing between her words. I just felt so tired and my head was throbbing. I didn't have the strength to open my eyes so I let myself drift off into the darkness.