The suicide diary

Chapter 7

"I'm not perfect. Never have been. Never will be"

I was surprised to see Dakota standing on my doorstep at 4 in the afternoon on a Thursday afternoon. I just kind of stood there looking at him weirdly. i was trying to figure out why he was here. but he finally spoke, "you weren't at school." he said and glanced down at my rolled up sleeves and had a sharp intake of breath. i quickly pulled my sleeves down and walked away from the door. i hoped he would just leave but i hoped wrong.

I was sitting on the couch with i pillow to my face when i felt someone sit down next to me. i knew it was Dakota so i didn't bother looking up. i felt his arms wrap around my shoulders and he pulled me to his chest. we just sat there, him holding me and me to shaken up to care.

When I finally stopped sobbing, Dakota let me go and handed me a tissue from the box next to him. I quietly thanked him and we just sat there. He reached into his bag in front of him and pulled something out. A journal, my journal. The one I was hunting all over to find.
"Where did you get that!?" I asked, snatching it from his hand.
"I picked it up when you ran into me at school, I forgot I had it, and I found it again last night. I was going to give it back at school, but you weren't there. So here." He answered me motioning towards the journal I already had in my hand.
He sighed and then said, "I looked through it Emily. I read a few pages. Like one about you having a crush on me. Another about suicide. One about cuts on your arms. I was hoping it wasn't true...." he trailed off.
I didn't know what else to say, I just whispered the words, "I'm sorry," and felt tears start to run down my face again.