Stay With Me

Is there good news?

I woke up and the sun was shining through closed curtains.  My brain had to process for a few minute everything that had happened yesterday, and then my hand bolted to my phone on the nightstand.  No messages, no missed calls.  I inhaled a deep breath and smelled bacon and eggs.  Right, Snow was here.  I'd forgotten about her.  Slipping out of bed, I put my slippers on and stepped out of my bedroom.

"Good morning Emma.  How do you feel?"  She looked at me quickly before going back to cooking.

"Lousy.  You didn't have to make breakfast.  I'm not completely helpless."  I sat down at the kitchen counter as she put eggs and bacon on a plate just as toast popped.

"I know you aren't helpless.  I just wanted to be helpful.  Whatever you need I can do for you."  I really wasn't hungry but she shoved the plate of food towards me, "You told me you'd eat a big breakfast."  I groaned and pushed my food around the plate.  I wasn't hungry.  I felt like I was going to throw up.

"I just want to go to the hospital and see him." Just to amuse her, I took a bite of my toast.

"Is he awake?  Did they call you?"  She had a hope in her voice that I knew was riddled with guilt.  It was David's fault after all. 

"No, but they could've just forgotten.  Let's go."  I stood up.

"Ah ah ah, not so fast.  Finish eating.  Visiting hours aren't until 10 anyways.  You've still got an hour.  Eat!"  I plopped back down as she made a plate and sat across from me. 

"He is going to get better Emma. I know it, I can feel it.  And you should be able to too.  True love's bond has a feeling.  If he was going to get worse you would've known."  She was smiling at me.  Another infamous hope speech brought to me by none other than Snow White herself.

"Yeah well-"  If I was going to throw up every day for nine months until the baby came, that child had better be worth it.  I ran to the bathroom and hurled up everything I had just eaten.  Snow came running in with a glass of water.  I kept throwing up until my stomach was empty and I was just dry heaving.  

"I'm sorry I made you eat."  She rubbed my back.  After a few minutes it was over for the moment and I brushed my teeth and got in the shower.  I rinsed all the sickness from my body and enjoyed the warmth of the water.  The positive thing about showers was they were so refreshing when you felt like crap.  The negative thing was that they gave you so much time to think.  When the only things you had to think about were extremely tragic and terrible, it never ended well.  At least the water falling onto my face masked the tears of my troubles.  I turned the shower off and wrapped myself in a fluffy towel.  In my room, I picked out some simple jeans, a white t-shirt, my brown jacket, and my most comfortable pair of boots.  It took 20 minutes to partially dry my hair and then I just brushed it and let it fall over my shoulders. The only makeup I had on was mascara because now it was 10 and I just wanted to get to the hospital.  In the living room, Snow was watching the news.  She had different clothes on and I figured David had brought her clothes while I was getting ready.

"Ready to go?"  She was a bit startled by my presence right next to her but she still smiled.

"Of course.  Let's go."  She clicked off the TV and we walked out of my apartment together.

----------

She drove my car because I wasn't really in the mood for driving and because she wanted to.  I told myself not to get my hopes up.  He could still be out, but there was also the possibility that he was awake.  He would've asked for me though... Wouldn't he? As she parked the car, my spirits were low.  When we walked through the doors, my spirits were high.  They dropped again as the front desk nurse looked at me nervously and quickly looked away. I walked to the front desk.

"Is... Killian Jones awake yet?"  She looked at me, was that pity in her eyes?

"I'll page his doctor.  He will be down in a minute."  I felt my world spinning. My heart hurt, something was wrong; very  wrong.  I sat next to Snow.  I was in a trance.  I couldn't think, couldn't move, could barely breathe.  I knew happiness was too much to ask for. 

"Emma? So?"  Something snapped inside me.

"Does it look like I'm okay?! Something is very wrong.  None of this would've happened if it weren't for Charming.  Just because you ruined my whole childhood doesn't mean you have to ruin my adult life too."  She looked like I just slapped her across the face, which to be honest was probably a better alternative to going straight for her heart.  I left her speechless.  The worst part was, I didn't regret what I had just said.  I winced at that.  Where had that come from?  I just had so much pain.  No one could keep the pain in forever.

"I- I think it's best if you go."  I was a monster.  I can't believe I just hurt her like that.  She was my mom.  If Henry had said that to me... I wouldn't even be able to function.  I'd apologize later.  I wasn't in the mood for anything right now.  She slowly stood up and left.  I felt terrible.

"Emma Swan?"  I bolted upright and turned to see a doctor.  He gave me a pathetically weak smile.  That's probably what doctors were best at.  Delivering heart crushing news to families.  I walked to him and he took me into a small private room.

"When Killian fell, he fractured his skull. That caused an extreme elevation in intracranial pressure and he had a stroke."  Oh my God. I put my hand over my mouth as I hoped there was good news next.

"Will he... be alright?"  The doctor looked to the ground, but then back at me.

"He has been pronounced comatose.  He could wake tomorrow, or in two years.  We can't be sure with patients like these."  I hated crying in front of anyone that wasn't Killian, but I couldn't stop the tears.  My true love was ripped from me.  What was I supposed to do without him?  I couldn't live without him.  He was a part of me.

"All we can do is hope for the best. I'm very sorry, Emma. How is the morning sickness?  Have you thrown up lately?"  My fiancé was in a coma, and he wanted to talk about me?  I didn't want to be here.  I just wanted to go home and curl up in a ball and die.

"I have not.  It's a lot better."  I stood up, and he said goodbye to me, "Can I see him?"  He hesitated but nodded his head.  I followed him through the hallways until we got to a room.  I was afraid to go in, afraid of the sight I would see.  The doctor opened the door and I walked in.  His whole life was there, supported by machines and tubes.  I started crying and sat down next to him.  The doctor had left me alone.

"Killian.  Please. Please wake up.  I need you.  Our baby needs you.  I can't live without you.  I love you."  I set my head down and cried by his hand.  He was the only person that anchored me to this life.  He saved me numerous times, he traded the only thing he had in life for me.  And now, he was almost gone.  I fell asleep on him after crying for a while.