5SOS Preferences

not an update!

Hi, guys.

I am back from my mission trip, and it has been so stressful and tiring. It started out pretty rough, but it got better.

I really did not know what to expect in Choctaw Nation of Oklahoma. We left at 7 AM on Friday and got there right before midnight. We had so many stops and we had to pick up a guy. When we got there, we met up with the leaders of the camp who were really nice. We spent the night in the cabins and I had to kill the bugs since the girls were afraid.

When the campers came, I was thrilled to teach the children! I was going to teach ages five to eight. They decided that they would change it up and I would teach zero to twelve. How was I supposed to do that? You can not teach babies, and that is such a broad age group. I began teaching and the older kids were so disrespectful and rude. I had to think about what they were going through and all the struggles they have, but it was so hard. When class time was over, I met up with my friend who was teaching fifteen to eighteen year olds and I could tell something had happened. She has a testimony full of: bullying, suicide attempts and self harm that she decided to share. The boys laughed and made fun of her. We obviously were not expecting that response.

We talked for awhile before meeting up with our pastor who wanted to check up on us. We said we had some problems, but we were still going to work with them. After he asked what was wrong, we were crying. It feels horrible for people to ignore or reject what you have to say - especially when you're trying to help them spiritually. He prayed with us and we decided to change up our way of teaching.

That night, we had everything sorted out and we were happy with the plans. My friend and I were in charge of worship along with two guys from my youth group. They rapped and we sang. We sang "Write Your Story" and "Oceans". While we sang, I noticed guys making fun of us and making noises. We looked to the back and avoided eye contact with people. Some guys from our youth group tried to get our attention and make faces at us to make us happy. We still were distracted by the guys doing that though. I closed my eyes and hoped for the song to pass by quickly. When the song ended, we ran outside and I found out the guys that were making fun of us were the guys who laughed at my friend's testimony. We sat outside for a couple seconds and then I heard "Oceans" being played on the piano. A guy started singing, and I was like, "we just sang that." We walked inside and saw the guy we had picked up, take over our worship time. We sat in the back and our friends were like "don't worry about it" and "you guys sounded great". The first day was a disaster.

The next three days were a lot better and the campers treated us better. We still had a couple guys making fun of us, but we had our youth group surrounding us. We grew a lot closer and I am so happy about that.

I cried so much on that mission trip. The Choctaw are faced with many problems. They are a minority and poverty is a big issue. Teenage pregnancies, drug addiction, and alcoholism and really big. Most of the kids have only one parent or a grandparent watching them. Many dads left or are alcoholics. Some of them do not face that, but it is common. They are expected to not be anything greater than their parents. The expectations put on them are so low. It is so strange to see how different their lives are compared to my community's. That is why I did not give up. God called us there for a reason, and it was not to give up on people who need Him.

We are also about to end vacation bible school at our church. My friend and I are in charge of worship again. I got really scared to sing in front of everyone, but I had to remind myself that not everyone will make fun of us. Now I have a habit of not making eye contact with anyone as I sing. Speaking in front of others is something I am working on and I did it once yesterday for VBS, and I am going to close up with a recap/challenge tomorrow. It just seems like everything was being thrown together and I got so stressed out.

My first mission trip was stressful, but I am glad I went. We made an impact in their lives and I could see it. I just hope they turn to God instead of worldly things that will only hurt them in the end.

Sorry for such a long note, but I needed to tell you guys that. If you actually read all of this, God bless.

Thank you so much for being so patient with me, I love you all!