How to Poison Your Husband [COMPLETE! Cozy Romantasy With A Dash Of Murder]

Step 11c: ...and never submit to your enemies

Shit, shit, shit!

This REALLY wasn't good!

Ivelle dug her heels into the dirt, trying to resist the two guards trying to drag her forcibly from the prison cell. "My presence? What do they want me for?"

"There must be some mistake." Lillian's hands fluttered delicately, her eyes going wide with dismay. "Good sirs, I have had ample chance to speak with Ivelle during this time we have been prisoners, and I have reason to believe she was wrongfully imprisoned - as I was. The true culprit sits there." She glanced fearfully at Mariel. "Surely if there is to be an interrogation, Princess Mariel should be tried first-as the one responsible for the king's murder."

The younger of the guards paused, looking confused.

"There is no mistake," Captain Burdock snapped. "Queen Ysette definitely asked for the jester. Princess Mariel will get her turn, don't worry. Now hurry up!"

"But Cap'n-"

Taking advantage of the younger guard's distraction, Ascoria surged forward and pressed a knife to his throat. "Order your men to unhand Ivelle now," she snapped. "Or this one dies. The blade is poisoned."

"Oh for the love of... where did she even get that? Do I have to do everything myself?"

Captain Burdock started forward. Before he could get three paces, a feathery form dove toward his eyes. He shrieked and flailed his arms.

"Ash!" Ivelle cried. "Be careful!"

Ash flapped around the captain's head, clawing and pecking at his scalp. As the third guard watched, distracted, Lillian flung herself forward and kicked him in the balls. He crumpled like a stone.

Footsteps thundered on the stairs. A second later, five more soldiers burst into view. As Ash careened to face them, an unlucky sweep of Captain Burdock's hands caught him across the chest. He careened through a grille, out of sight.

"Ash!"

Ivelle sprinted toward her friend. She had only gone five paces when the guard whose balls Lillian had kicked grabbed her by the ankles. She crashed to the floor, the breath exploding from her lungs.

"ENOUGH!"

Captain Burdock had recovered from Ash's attack. He slammed the cell door shut, trapping Ascoria, Lillian, and the youngest guard (who was still held at knifepoint by Ascoria) inside. Before Ivelle could scramble to her feet, he grabbed the back of her hair and wrenched her head backward, causing her eyes to tear up with pain.

"I fucking hate birds!" Burdock roared. His head was scratched in multiple places from where Ash's claws had met their mark. Blood oozed down his forehead, and his eyes were crazed. He thrust the keys into Ivelle's manacles, unlocked them with shaking hands, and pushed her toward his posse of guards, who hurried to secure her. "One more funny move out of you, and everyone here dies!" He waved his arms expansively. "I don't care how innocent or guilty you are!"

A low whine permeated the cell block.

"I don't mean you, Puggles." The captain bent down to scratch Lord Saffron behind the ears. "You're a good boy. It's the rest of them that are the problem!" He glared at the guards. "What are you waiting for? Take her to the queen!"

~*~

Ash was correct: Queen Ysette had indeed been redecorating. The palace halls were darker than Ivelle remembered. Vines clung to the walls in twisting lattices. These were not the pretty, green vines of summertime. They were dark, creeping things that strangled the marble columns and clogged the bay windows. They seemed to suck away what little light remained in the halls, leaving them cold and dark. A tense energy hung on the air like the static before a storm.