Vision Of Blood

Chapter 25

-SILAS POV-

The next morning, I go on a walk with Serena on a trail,  I look around. "How have you been... with, you know, everything?" I ask, glancing at Serena who looks back at me with a small smile.

"I've been alright, just... thinking about a lot right now..." she says, looking ahead at the lake as we stop at the dock, I sit down, furrowing my eyebrows.

"Want to talk about it?" I ask, looking at Serena.

Serena sighs softly, hesitation in her eyes. "I've just..." She looks at the lake, shoulders falling. "I don't know, I've been thinking about how we are never going to get away from what Maria has caused us."

I pause, looking at the lake as my eyebrows furrow. "We will."

Serena scoffs slightly, looking at me, I can tell right then and there this is going to become an argument, I choose to stay calm, not wanting to say anything.

"No matter what the fuck we do Silas, she will always be there, imbedded into our minds, her hands.... His hand—" She stops when I finally snap my head at her.

"You don't know anything about his hands." I say coldly, looking into her eyes as she narrows her eyes.

"But you do, Silas... you're telling me that you don't think about it at all? You think that once we kill Maria that all of it is going to go away?" She snaps, I bite my tongue, telling myself that she is just frustrated and has the right to be, I fiddle with my anxiety ring; not looking at her.

"Genuinely silas. This will never go away, we will always remember everything.." Serena says, shaking her head, I finally look back at her.

"It won't go away." I agree. "But we will have to move past it whether we like it or not. Our past does not define us, why should we let it?" I question, titling my head.

"Because no matter what, no matter where we are, what we are doing... it's always going to be there. Jesus..." She rubs her forehead, my jaw clenches, I can tell that there is more to this, something she is not telling me.

"What the fuck really is it Serena, you're kind of pissing me off." I furrow my eyebrows, sitting straighter, Serena meets my eyes.

"Everyone... has always talked about your experience with Maria. No one gave a fuck about mine. Just because I never got hit by her as much as you did, just because her boyfriend didn't touch me like he did with you doesn't mean that I don't have trauma of my own and everyone completely ignores that." Serena says quietly, I tense slightly, looking away.

"Serena—" I start but she cuts me off. "No... clearly you're everyone's favorite. The only person that ever truly asked me was carlito." she looks at me before continuing. "I feel like everytime we are in a room together all attention goes to you, and it always has. They love me I know they do.. but that doesn't change the fact that they make me feel invisible sometimes."

I slowly nod, listening. "I understand.."

"Do you?" she snaps slightly, I furrow my eyebrows as she continues. "Because you always had support."

My jaw clenches, I look at the lake. "Let's just go back to the fucking house, they wanted to have family dinner. I'm done with this conversation if you are just going to say shit you're definitely going to regret later, because I'm not gonna give you reassurance that it is okay." I say coldly, I stand up, and start walking back to the trail, I hear Serena's steps behind me, but we don't talk.