She Brung Me The Horizon

Chapter 15: the boy who blocked his own shot

i heard this song in my head as i typed, really brought on the feels

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26 days.

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"Hey Oli," I greet.

It had been almost a week since the whole ordeal happened and let's just say, things hadn't at all improved. Oliver was like a ghost in the shadows as he would avoid me, not giving me much of a chance to talk to him alone.

Because he was never alone.

But he was just never with me.

Oliver jumped, turning to face me. He had a cigarette hanging out of his mouth, the end of it glowing orange as it had just been lit.

"Hi." His replied deadpanned.

We stood outside the tour bus that was parked behind tomorrows venue, everyone was fast asleep in their bunks in the buses, smartly resting for the show.

Stars from the night sky shone dimly on us, but it was just enough to see each other.

I gulped. It was now or never, Autumn.

"Can I talk to you?"

He took a drag from the cigarette and then held it between his two fingers, exhaling the smoke as he spoke.

"Aren't we talking now?"

I shuffled my feet and crossed my arms.

"Please talk to me, Oliver." I tried to keep the desperateness out of my voice. But I probably failed at that, too.

Though it was dark, I saw something in his eyes soften.

"I'm listening," he replied in a neutral tone.

I stepped closer to him and held my hand out. He was like stone as his expression remained hardened as he handed me the cigarette. I took a slow drag, figuring out what to say exactly in my mind.

I had far enough time to think about it over the week but the right words just weren't coming to me, I was starting to believe that were wasn't any 'right' thing to say.

"I'm really sorry about what happened, Oliver," I handed him back the cigarette and he took it back with a solemn expression, "I didn't mean to hurt-"

He cut me off.

"You don't have to apologize for not liking me back, Autumn."

His brown eyes were intent on mine, enough to send shivers down my spine from where I stood.

How did he get to me so much?

"But that's just it Oli, that's what I need to talk to you about. I messed-"

He put the cigarette out and smashed it into the concrete with his black van.

"Autumn you didn't mess up. I did. I was thinking irrationally and got caught up in the moment, I guess."

I felt something in my chest twinge at his words.

"What do you mean?" I questioned quietly, my eyes averting to the ground.

I heard him take a deep breath.

"I'm getting married, Autumn. I'm getting married to the woman that I love in less than a month, I just second guessed myself and I acted out. I'm sorry that I kissed you and for coming onto you like that."

And with that, he walked past me, heading to the tourbus door.

How could he walk away from me so easily?