The Ties that Bind [ONGOING]

13

"Athena?"

I can hear my heart pounding right now.
Nakita ko kung paano nito tinignan ang paligid hanggang sa napadako ang tingin nito sa aking anak. I saw how her face turned to pale. Sinusuri nito ang bawat parte ng maukha ng bata na parang kinokompara sa 'kin.

Hindi lang pala birthday ang meron ngayon kundi rebelasyon rin. I massage the bridge of my nose.

"Uh... Tita, It's g-good to see y-you." nauutal na wika ko. I can't believe I am doing this right now. Ni hindi ako makapag-isip ng sasabihin na walang pag-uutal na nagaganap.

"Oh my God, Athena. I still can't believe it until I saw it in my own eyes." Hindi makapaniwalang nakatitig ito sa aking anak. "I've already know it years ago that you're pregnant like what your mom said, but seeing it right now is still unbelievable...". Napalunok ako at iniwas ang tingin.

I'm not even prepared for this. I don't know what to say. It's just happened so quickly.

"You three, you know about this, and you keep quiet?" she asked my brothers and her daughter. Parang tinitestingan ang mga ito.

"Tita, you know what happened between Athena and Mom. We just respect her decisions if she doesn't want to tell anyone." Gab said.

Naging malumay naman ang mga tingin nito ngayon. Napabuntong hininga ito na parang may iniisip. She slowly walked straight to me and held my cheek, caressing it gently.

Napapatitig ako sa mukha nito. They really look alike. Of course, they're twin's. How I miss my mom doing this to me. Right now, all I could do is imagine things and hope that it will be back how we used to be lovely each other.

"I'm so sorry that you've been through a lot, Athena." she said softly. At tinignan rin si Kirlstine."Just remember that if you need anything you can call me. You dont need to hide. Everyone will love the kid Athena, I am sure of that."

"It's okay, Tita. No worries, Kirlstine's with me since then." I said and gave her a little smile for assurance. Napangiti naman ito at tinignan rin ang sariling anak. Tinanaw nito ang anak ko na ngayon ay binubuhat na ni Levi habang pinapapak ang icing sa kamay.

"Five? So it's her birthday," Umalis ito sa harapan ko at dahan-dahang nilapitan ang aking anak. "Hello, little girl." Napangiting sambit nito. Tinignan naman ito ng bata na may malaking ngiti sa labi habang pumapapak parin ng icing sa kamay. Napatawa si tita sa nakita kaya pinisil niya ang pisngi ng aking anak.

Napatigil naman ito na parang may biglang iniisip.

"Oh shoot, I forgot. Before I came here, I texted your mother that we would meet here after I landed earlier. We plan to have coffee outside. I'll just call her Athena so that you'll not going to meet each other, not now." wika nito pagkatapos ng biglang pagkatahimik nito.

Oh God! Everything is literally happening so fast. Paano kung dumating nga?

Sobrang saya sanang isipin na nirerespeto nila ang mga desisyon ko pero hindi pa ito ang tamang oras para doon.

Nakita kung nilabas ni Tita ang phone nito at may kung anong tinetext doon.

What should I do?

Is this the right time to tell everybody?

Sumasakit na ang ulo ko sa kakaisip. I know my mom. She built differently. Mukha palang noon nakakatakot na paano pa kaya kung kaharap ko siya ngayon. Kahit nga mga kapatid kung lalaki hindi tatalab doon.

Natatakot akong makita siya at masaksihan ang mukha ng pagkadismaya. Sa loob ng limang taon iyon ang palagi kung iniisip. Alam ko sa sarili ko kung ano akong klaseng anak noon. Alam ko na mali lahat ng mga ginagawa ko sa buhay noon. And I'm shy to admit and confront my mom with all the things that I did in the past. Sobrang nakakahiya, puno ako ng yabang at pride noon pero ngayon? Hindi ko alam kung nasaan ako. Hindi ko alam kung saan ako tatayo.