The Ties that Bind [ONGOING]

17

"How did you know, Alesia?"

Hindi parin ako nagsasalita. Tahimik lang akong nakaupo.

Palaging si Xia nalang ang nagtatanong para sa akin. Hindi ko lubos ma proseso sa aking isipan ang mga katagang sinasabi ni Alesia sa harapan ko ngayon.

Everything is shocking.

All I could imagine was the image of my daughter smiling at me. Ang mukha nito na puno ng replika sa mukha ni Zane. Kuhang-kuha niya lahat. Kung siguro ipapaboy-cut ko ang anak ay magiging mini Zane na ito.

I miss my daughter. I want to hug her tightly right now. I want her small hands wrapped around me. Feelin' the heat of her hug. She makes the cold surroundings warm. It makes me feel safe somewhat.

"Aside from that, I am a fan of Formula 1." Sagot ni Alesia sa kaibigan na si Xia.

"Of course! He’s a very famous man, Xia. His name is Zane Kohl, and he’s a professional Formula 1 driver for the Scuderia Ferrari team. In the racing world, he uses the name Kohl as his racing name, so almost everyone just calls him Kohl. Ferrari is not just any car brand—it’s one of the most famous and respected car companies in the entire world." Sambit nito sa tanong ng kaibigan. Nagpatuloy ito sa pagsasalita.

Kung sikat pala ito bakit hindi man lang nagsabi si Alesia tungkol dito.

Pero kasi, all she knows is Zane, iyan ang palagi kung sinasabi sa kanila noon paman, and I never show any picture of him because I don't have one, or explain it them his facial features. Sa dami ba namang Zane sa mundo hindi talaga ito mabibigyan ng idea kung sino. And he got known as Kohl, not Zane. It just makes sense.

"Let me tell you what happened." Napatuon kami ng husto ni Alesia.

"During the Monaco Grand Prix, which is a very important race held in his home country, he had a terrible accident. It was a very bad crash—so bad that most people wouldn’t have survived it. But by some miracle, he did survive. Unfortunately, though, he lost his memory because of the accident. He suffered from amnesia, which means he couldn’t remember anything. This news was all over the headlines two years ago. It was especially big news in some Formula 1 fans here in the Philippines because he has Filipino roots. Many people here felt connected to him because of that, and they followed his story closely, hoping he would recover and find his way back in the race track." Wika nito na mas lalong nakapagtahimik sa amin. Nanatili kaming nakikinig.

Two years ago, I was very quiet and hiding. Wala akong katiting na balita patungkol sa social media sa loob ng limang taon. I wanted to stay hidden from the world because I was focused on something very important—building myself up to be a stronger and better person for my daughter.

At that time, Zana was about three years old. She needed me to be strong for her, to take care of her and protect her no matter what. So, I put all my energy into becoming the kind of mother she deserved, even if it meant staying away from everything else and everyone else for a while. It wasn’t easy, but I knew it was necessary. I wanted to make sure that when I came back, I would be ready to face whatever life had in store for us.

"Kaya pala familiar siya. I heard the news before, but wala naman akong pake that time because I am not into racing." Sambit ni Xia na nagpatango kay Alesia.

Habang si Hailee na tahimik lang na nakikinig sa mga sinasabi ni Alesia. Nakaupo lang ito sa tabi ko, na kahit walang sinasabi na kataga ay ang kilos naman nito ang nagpapakita ng pagka-simpatya sa akin.

He's a racer? A famous racer? Got into an accident? And then amnesia?

Oh my God! This is just too much to handle all at once. My mind feels like it’s spinning, and I can’t even think clearly anymore. Everything is overwhelming, and it’s like my thoughts are tangled in a mess, I can’t figure out.