The Cheater [JenLisa]

Chapter 18

The rest of the photoshoot felt like a blur. I moved through the poses like a robot, adjusting my body to fit the angles the photographer demanded. I smiled when I was told to, held my gaze when the camera clicked, and twisted my body into shapes that didn't feel natural. It was exhausting, both mentally and physically. I had expected it to be hard, but I hadn't prepared for how much it would wear me down.

By the time the shoot wrapped up, I was barely holding myself together. My feet were sore from standing in uncomfortable positions, and my face ached from forcing that smile. The high-energy atmosphere of the studio had drained me, and the constant pressure to be perfect felt suffocating.
Blake barely acknowledged me as we finished.

He was already on his phone, barking orders to someone, no doubt coordinating the next part of the day's schedule. As much as I hated to admit it, his indifference stung. He was the one who had pulled me into this world, the one who had promised me fame, success, and a life I thought I wanted. But now, all I felt was like a pawn in his game, moving through tasks without any say in the matter.
Alia, on the other hand, was the only one who seemed to notice how exhausted I was. She approached me after I'd changed back into my own clothes, her eyes scanning my face.

"You look like you need a drink," she said, her voice warm. "How about we grab something before we head back to the office?"

I hesitated for a moment, still feeling the weight of the day pressing down on me. "I don't know if I can handle another thing today," I muttered, my voice tired. "It's like I'm just going through the motions, you know?"
Alia's expression softened, and she nodded. "Yeah, I get it. But listen, you did great today. No one's expecting you to be perfect right away. You're allowed to have a moment to breathe."

I didn't know if she was saying that for me or for herself, but either way, it felt like the first genuine thing anyone had said to me all day. I gave her a tired smile.

"Thanks, Alia," I said quietly. "I'm just... trying to figure this all out."

"You're not alone in that," she said, placing a hand on my shoulder. "But for now, let's get out of here and get you something to eat. You can process everything later."

The idea of food and a break sounded like heaven, so I agreed without protest. We stepped out of the studio and into the crisp air, the world outside feeling so much quieter than the chaos we'd left behind.

We walked to a nearby café, and Alia made sure to order us both something simple but comforting—a warm bowl of ramen for her and a chilled iced tea for me. As I sipped the drink, I could feel my body slowly unwinding, the tension easing just a little.

"So, tell me," Alia started, her tone more casual now that the pressure of the shoot was behind us. "How are you really feeling about all of this?"

I didn't hesitate this time. "I don't know, Alia. I thought I wanted this. I thought I was ready for the spotlight. But now that I'm in it, it feels... wrong. Like I'm pretending to be someone else, and I don't even know who that person is."

She nodded thoughtfully, her gaze softening. "I know what you mean. It's easy to get caught up in the glamour of it all, to think that once you're there, everything will click into place. But the reality is different. It's a lot of work. A lot of pressure. And yeah, sometimes it feels like you're just a piece in a bigger machine."

Her words hit me harder than I expected. It was like she'd been reading my thoughts all day. I had to remind myself that Alia had been in this world longer than I had. She had seen the uglier sides of it, and yet she was still here, still fighting for something, even if I didn't quite understand what that was.

"I don't know if I can keep pretending," I admitted, my voice almost a whisper. "I don't know how to be the person they want me to be."
Alia's eyes softened with
understanding. "You don't have to pretend to be someone else. You just have to figure out how to fit yourself into this world. It's not about becoming something you're not, it's about finding a way to be who you are, just... on a bigger stage."

I stared into my iced tea, letting her words sink in. I hadn't thought about it like that. Maybe I was so focused on fitting in that I forgot I didn't have to change everything about myself. I could still be me—just, a version of me that worked in this world. I could still find my own space in it, if I was willing to fight for it.

"You're right," I said after a long pause. "I don't have to be perfect. I just need to figure out how to make this work for me."

Alia smiled, her eyes lighting up.

"Exactly. And if you ever feel like you can't do it alone, I'm here. I'm your manager, but I'm also your friend. You don't have to carry this weight on your own."

The words felt like a lifeline, like someone finally saw me for who I was, not just as a model or an image. It was a small comfort, but it was enough to keep me going.

After we finished our meal, we headed back to the office. The evening had settled into a quiet lull, and I found myself feeling strangely calm as I stepped back into the building. Blake was already there, waiting, his phone pressed to his ear as he directed some other part of the team. He barely acknowledged our return.

"Jane," he said without looking up, "we've got some more paperwork for you to sign. And I need to go over your schedule for the next week. We're pushing a new campaign, and you'll be the face of it."

I nodded, trying to push aside the exhaustion that was starting to creep back. "Alright, I'm ready."

As I followed Blake to his office, I realized that no matter how hard this felt, I wasn't going to back down. I had come this far. I had made the decision to step into this world, and I wasn't about to let it break me now.

But I also knew something else. The person I was becoming wouldn't be the person they wanted me to be. I was going to find my own way, even if it meant carving out a path no one expected.

Alia had been right. I didn't have to be perfect. I just had to be myself.
And maybe, just maybe, I could find a way to make it work.