BE ON CLOUD Masterpieces~A Snippet Collection

BOC Snippet 11-4 Minutes-Fallen

BOC Snippet

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Fallen

Korn's POV

The day Tonkla said yes to being my beloved was one of the happiest day in my life. Winning his heart took me long enough that I was surprised myself. I am accustomed to people throwing themselves at me, for infinite reasons and I thought I have seen them all, until it comes to Tonkla. When I first decided to go for him, I prepared myself for anything. He could be the usual kind who kept his innocent façade until we are together. 

I don't mean to brag but I am after all the most eligible bachelor in the campus and with my family background, I am the walking dream. I was that confident to get Tonkla under my grasp in the shortest time but it took me almost a three months to even score a proper date with him. Even that, I couldn't exactly call it a date. 

I had to work really extra hard. I found out about his family background and everything I can about Tonkla and his only existing younger brother. The usual sob story. Came from a broken family, mother gone and alcoholic and abusive dad who goes in and out of jails sometimes and drunk most the time. Now I get how did the traces of scars from Tonkla came from. He never really liked talking about himself and would only answer vaguely when I asked. I never pushed him to. After all, back then, I haven't established our relationship status and from the likes of Tonkla's personality, he isn't the kind of people who would just accept anyone's help without first thinking of the motives behind. 

In that way, I think Tonkla and I are kinda similar. I was taught to never underestimate someone's intention no matter how genuine it might sound. My father taught me so and it has always worked. I guess for Tonkla, it was the trauma of being betrayed by people he was around with. Poor thing. 

Like I said, my journey of wooing this boy took me long enough. I remembered how during our first "date", he didn't even realize it was a date when I took him to the movies. I remember picking a horror movie so when the cliche jump scares come out, he can jump into the safety of my embrace but he barely flinched. He even tried paying me back for the movie ticket which I refused of course. 

With Tonkla, I learned that I have to be more straightforward and direct with my words and intentions. Only after I told him I am trying to woo him that I saw a hint of blush from his cheeks the first time. He tried hiding his shy smiles too. 

I have been with enough pretty and cute people. Tonkla if I go with the level of people I have gone out with, would really rank in the lower tier but to me that day, Tonkla looked the cutest and the most beautiful. His small frame hidden by baggy clothes that I got him under the pretext of getting rid of my old clothes made him the more endearing, to me. 

I didn't know I had fully fallen for me until that party. 

During the period I was chasing after Tonkla, I have to say I was fully committed and didn't mess around. Heck, I even deleted contacts that I used to have casual flings with. Tonkla didn't have to ask me to do anything nor did I ever need him to do anything but I just wanted to do right by Tonkla. It felt right. 

The only thing gnawing me the entire time was the fact that I didn't tell him about Fahsai. 

Fahsai. 

Until I met Tonkla, Fahsai was the only possible future reality for me. But with Tonkla, I started to falter. I want to keep Tonkla by my side. I want to walk this life with Tonkla. I want to love Tonkla, to cherish him and to make him blush and smile in shyness for me. I want Tonkla's eyes to reflect only my face. 

But this alternate reality seemed impossible. I can imagine the wrath of my father and mother and Fahsai's side if they find out about Tonkla. It was selfish of me to pursue Tonkla knowing full well he has to stay in the dark but I can't help it. I just want him. 

It was my birthday party so I invited him to come. It wasn't supposed to be awkward for him, okay, less considering I invited half his course mates as well but from my observation, it doesn't seem like he is particularly closed with anyone of them. 

I didn't want a big party but again, my background just wouldn't allow anything but a luxury celebration. Fahsai said she wouldn't be able to make it with her forever busy engagements somewhere around the world. I thought it was safe to invite him. 

By then, we already held hands and kissed a few times but we hadn't gone all the way. He seemed to avoid the subject every time I even hinted about it. I didn't want to pressure him. With Tonkla, I wanted us to take our time. 

I never formally introduced him as my boyfriend either and he never pushed. 

I tried to look out for him during the party but almost always spotted him at the corner of some sort, holding a glass of drink, watching me with a smile from afar. He even got me a present which I was definitely looking forward to open later in private. 

It was the cake cutting moment that ruined it all. Fahsai pulled a surprise appearance with my birthday cake and the kiss she gave me on my lips, definitely gave everything away. 

The next time I looked for Tonkla, he has already gone and my bodyguards couldn't locate him anywhere. I escaped from my own birthday party the soonest to look for him but he wasn't at his dorm room and he wasn't answering his phone. 

The more I can't find him, the more I started to panic. In all honesty, I have never felt the night I felt not finding Tonkla. The anxiety and stress as I repeatedly trying to reach him and trying to find by all means. I couldn't instruct my bodyguards to do much without them leaking information to my parents so I had to do it by myself. 

I only found Tonkla when it was almost dawn. By the pier near the end of the city. One of the first few places I took him to as part of our "dates" that he wasn't even aware of.  

He was staring out the sea, hugging his knees to his chest, deep in thoughts. When he noticed me, the eyes that stared right back at me were of disappointment and sadness yet there were no tears. Only bloodshot from the lack of sleep and possibly crying before I came. 

Did he feel betrayed again? 

I never wanted him to feel that ever. 

When I ran over to hug him, he didn't resist. His body cold from the sea wind chilling him the entire night. He didn't respond to my hug either. 

As I let him go and cupped his cheek, it was I who was desperate to convince him. Convincing him to believe my love for him. Convincing him that we are possible and not to give up on us. Convincing him I'll do everything in my power to fight for us. All the way he said nothing. 

After a long pause, he cupped my face with his cold hands. He gave me a smile. 

I want to keep that smile on his face. That smile that told me he was still hoping what I said was true. He chose to believe me, one more time. 

That's when I realized how hard I have fallen for him. 

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