Ask Jake (Book One of the Whisper Series)

Ten: Can't Stop Thinking About Her

Adam

The image of that guy on Gillian's camera is burning a whole in my mind. It has to be Tristan. He looked so, young, and the photo was taken on a beach. I wonder when the last time she was at the beach. She said she had not taken photos in years. Does that mean she did not use her camera at all, or she had not taken artsy photos for years?

That guy looked way to young for her. Way to, damn, tan too.

I should have just asked her about the photo. I don't know what I am afraid of.

Yes, I do. I am afraid of hearing her say that she loves him. I already felt how much she loves him. The thought of it makes my blood boil with jealousy. I would do anything for her to kiss me the way she did that night, when she thought I was him.

She started acting weird right before she left today. Why? We were having such a good time, at least I thought we were.

I lift my phone:

ME: *Did you get home okay?*

GILLIAN: *Not yet, stopped at the market.*

ME: *I had a great time with you today. Thanks for coming over.*

GILLIAN: *We always have a great time. Bye.*

Bye? I wonder. What does that mean?

I turn on the television, and there is nothing on. Why and the hell do I pay for cable and all those damn channels and there is nothing on? I throw the remote.

I try to do the books for Smash, but I can't concentrate.

Fuck. She is all I can think about. The more time I spend with Gillian the more I want.

I go into the kitchen and grab some chips. I'm not hungry!

ME: *Greg, what's going on tonight?*

GREG: *This is Greg's sous, he said to tell you, he's shakin his moneymaker in the kitchen. It's a slow night. Three-fourth's cancelled their reservations. Blizzard.*

Why didn't I tell him to close the restaurant tonight? We'll be luckily if we break even tonight.

Lying on my bed, I look out at the city. The lights are moving again, now that the street are plowed. 'An intricate maze', that's what she called it that night. Examining the scene before me, I see what she means. It seems like each set of lights has a purpose...I think the red were a heartbeat, and green...oh hell, I can't remember, but it was beautiful.

Damn! I have to distract myself with something other than her.

I turn on my phone and start playing a game. It sucks. I throw my phone across the bed.

My mom's in Italy. I wonder how much fun she is having. It's the middle of the night there. Instead of calling, I send her an email.

The book I started a few months ago is so boring. No wonder it could not keep my attention. I toss it at the garbage can and am amazed when I make the basket. Balling up some papers out of my side table, play a game of hoops in my bedroom. I feel pretty proud of myself when I've made most of the trashcan baskets.

Well, that took about five minutes.

I am going crazy. I need to get the hell out of here. I grab my wallet and head to Smash. Greg is always the best distraction.

Gillian

I went to the market and walked around, feeling depressed. The last thing I want is space from Adam, but until I can be around him without wanting to kiss him... I'm just going to have to stay away from him.