Things Have Changed For Me

The "Perfect" Sight

I guess you could already have guessed what I did after what happened last night. I grabbed my stuff and walked off. Part of me thought that I shouldn't have, but you have to do what you feel is right. So that's what I did, I walked off.

"Ana, wait!" Brendon ran after me, waking Ryan & Jess up in the process of doing that.

"Where are you going," Ryan asked as he got up and followed Brendon.

"I'm.. I'm going home. I'm tired. And- Okay Bye."

I heard Brendon shaking his car keys in his hand. "You don't even have a car."

I walked out of the house. Heck, I only lived 10 minutes away. I don't need anyone's help.

And what do you know? Someone honking their car horn comes driving up to me.

"Get in the car, Ana."

"Jess, I'm walking home. I'm fine."

"If you don't get in the car, I'll follow you home anyways. So make use of the warmth of my heated seats, okay?" She was always the one to make people laugh. I got in the car, only because it was freezing outside, and we drove to my house

Ever since then, I think a month or so have passed since I've last talked to any of the group. There's been a few Hi's and Bye's here and there, but other than that, I think it's just been me alone.

Actually, that's not completely true. Jess and Spencer have talked to me every time we've seen each other. We've talked during and after school, and we're always hanging out together. So I guess I did get something out of coming back to school here.

You probably think that's it? That this is how everything's going to be from now? Well, no. It's not.

•~•~•~•

I walked to lunch with Jess, and soon met up with Spencer. In all honesty, I felt bad for Ryan. It felt like Jess was spending so much time with me that she forgot about Ryan. And trust me, I've tried telling her to just go with him, but she always denies everything.

"H-Hey Jess." Speaking of Ryan.

"Hey Ross," Jess said to him, a little more excited than normal. I nodded to Spence to scoot down a little more so Ryan could sit down.

He sat down, and him & Jess were talking like before. Spencer and I pretended to talk, but we were actually listening in on the two. It's just a little eavesdropping.

At first, they were asking how the other one was, and how everything was going. You know- The usual conversations people have before something serious is brought up.

"I miss you, Jess. I really do. And I don't know if I did anything wrong, or if we're o-over, but I just want to know!" He was acting like a shy little 7th grader. And I felt this pit of guilt. Y'know, that feeling you get when you know you've done something terribly wrong.

"Ryan-," Jess started to say.

"No, Jess. I need to know now. I'm serious! And I'm never serious! You don't realize how miserable I've been-"

"RYAN ROSS CAN YOU SHUT UP FOR ONE MINUTE PLEASE?!" Oops. That shut the room up. "Ryan, I love you with all my heart. And I just- I don't know why we haven't talked. Ever since Christmas, things have been off between all of us."

"If I may," Spencer added in, "why don't we just all get together like a bunch of ants and be friends again. Yeah? Okay."

And, what do you know, Jon and Brendon walk right to us. As if on cue, all four of them look at me.

"What?" It was getting pretty awkward.

Brendon cleared his throat. "You haven't really said anything much."

"I think that- I hate all of you." They all had that Really-Bitch look on their faces. Oh, the funny moments. "I'm kidding. I love you all and I think it's an amazing idea."

•~•~•~•

"Wanna stay over night? We have that test to study for tomorrow anyways." I asked Jess when she dropped me off at my house, as usual.

"Sure! I'll just need to go home and get my things! See ya later alligator!" Another thing you should know about Jess, she's a little kid trapped in a highschooler's body. And she's full of surprises.

A few minutes later, her car came driving up, except she wasn't alone. Yes, everybody. In that car were her, Jon, Spencer, Ryan and Bren- Oh. No Brendon? That's odd.

"Surprise!" They all yelled out to me.

"I have a small house, you know. But my uncle isn't here so you're lucky." They ran inside before I did and threw all their stuff on the floor.

"I bet you're wondering where Brendon is!" You couldn't believe how excited he was to tell me this. He was like a little girl buying tickets to her favorite band.

"Uh, yeah. I kinda was wondering because-"

"He's waiting in his car in front of the school! He's waiting for you, Ana!" He could tell that I wasn't going to say anything so he continued. "He wants to tell you something important!"

"Important as in what?"

"Important as in Brendon and Ana sitting in a tree! K-I-S-S-I-N-G..." Jon and Spencer kept singing their little nursery rhyme. And I didn't know what to do.

"Ana. I know you probably don't want to go, but we're taking you. Now go to your room because we're making you gorgeous!" Jess was all jumpy and squealy.

"Wow, thanks. So I'm not gorgeous," and, just to add to the fun, I did a little hair flip and winking. Jess and Ryan pushed me to my room to give me my 'makeover'.

We got in there, and I just took my time sitting on my chair while Ryan & Jess got my things ready for me. They looked like one of those stylists on the TV show 'What Not to Wear'. They just kept throwing my clothes everywhere and my room began to look like a mountain than an actual room.

"I have the perfect shirt." Jess held out a shirt that I didn't even remember I had. It was this dark blue shirt, dragged out with black jeans and white boots.

"I can do the makeup," Ryan cheered. I looked to Jess because I wasn't exactly certain, and she gave me a nod. "Trust me. I'm good at this."

•~•~•~•

We were all in Jess's car, and she parked a few blocks away so that Brendon wouldn't see us all there. They nearly pushed me out of the car when it was parked. I don't know why they were so excited. If anything, I didn't think this was going to go well.

The walk over to the school seemed like it took days. In all honesty, I was kind of looking forward to it. Then I started to think it was going to be amazing when I saw his car. I don't think he saw me, because he didn't get out of the car or do anything, really. I could feel my heart thumping and as I got closer to the car, I walked a little faster.

I stopped when I was close enough to see what was really going on. I saw someone's blonde hair in the car. No, it wasn't Brendon's. It was the girl in the car with him. And they weren't just sitting there. Oh, no. Lips on lips. Hand on ass. The whole 9-yards was going on in there. But, hey. At least they still haven't taken off their clothes.. yet.

I didn't realize it was raining. I didn't realize anything around me except the fact that I actually believed something was going to happen between us. I was stupid enough to become friends with Brendon in the first place, but to actually LOVE him?! It was idiotic. Fucking idiotic.