Things Have Changed For Me

Epilogue

After the concert, it took our little group awhile to get back to how close we were before. It was nice, y'know. Having your friends back and finding out how much we've all changed within the past years.

You couldn't understand how much I loved all these guys. It was pretty insane. No matter what happens, we all know that we have someone to go to for anything whatsoever.

•~•~•~•~•

"Sugar or no sugar in your coffee," I asked Brendon who was sitting on the couch in our apartment.

"Sugar, obviously," he laughed. "When are Ryan and Jess going to be here?" As if on cue, the doorbell rang, with the couple standing at the front of our door.

They sat down across from Brendon, and I brought them all whatever drink they wanted. Brendon pulled me into the space next to him and put his arm around me.

"You could have just asked me to sit next to you instead of forcing me," I joked, rolling my eyes.

He gave a small chuckle, and said, "Yeah, I could have. But it makes me feel more needy if I pull you to me."

"And you want to seem needy," Ryan asked. This led them into a really off conversation.

While they were joking and laughing about, I realized how truly happy all of us were together. And it made me think-

What if we never flew to New York two months ago to do that contest?

Would we have ever met up again?

I would've had Jess with me for sure. And maybe Sean, except for the fact that he flew back to Northern California to finish up his degree in college.

And what if I had just stayed in that alley and not went back to look for Brendon?

Lots of things have gone wrong over the years. We've all been through hell, but somehow we managed to get through it. It may seem odd, but all the shit we've been put through has always brought out something great in all of us.

Maybe I did feel like locking myself in my room for years when I saw Brendon with another girl in his car that one night.

But didn't he end up telling me that he loved me?

And that time Ryan completely ignored Jess because he couldn't handle telling anyone what had happened between him and his father?

He and Jess have never been as close as they were when they finally made up.

"Hello? Anybody home," Jess said, snapping her fingers in front of my face. "We've been talking for nearly an hour and you've barely said anything."

"Oh, sorry. Just thinking about stuff," I replied, seeming as blunt as possible. "And a whole hour? Really?"

Ryan suddenly stood up and checked the time. "Dammit. We were only supposed to stay for a little. I've got errands to run, but I'll catch up with you guys later."

"But we were supposed to talk about the new record," Brendon said, seeming a little disappointed. Ryan told him that they'd work on it later, and that they'd have to do it with all four members.

"Actually, Ryan, you mind if I stay for a little more," Jess asked hopefully. "I need to talk to Ana about some things."

"We only have one car-" Ryan began before he got interrupted.

Brendon grabbed his car keys, and pulled Ryan out the door. "We'll catch up with you two later," he shouted on his way to his car.

I took a sip of my coffee before asking Jess what she wanted to talk about. "I just wanted to say thank you," she began. "I never really told you how grateful I am to you that you talked to Brendon that one day. I know it must've been hard, but you managed to do it for us. And I can't thank you enough."

"Jess, I don't- I mean, it wasn't anything. It was helpful to me too and you don't have to thank me. I should be the one thanking you for staying by my side all these years. Really." I started to tear up, and I could tell she was, too. We've been there for each other since I first moved back to their school.

We talked for hours about anything we'd been thinking about lately and it felt good to laugh things off with her. We would make fun of each other here and there, and sometimes it would go from being the most serious conversation to the most comedic.

It all ended when Brendon came back, looking a little upset. Jess excused herself and then left, leaving him and I alone.

He sat down, and I took a seat next to him, holding his arm with my head on his shoulder. I let him decide if he wanted to talk about anything, and just to take his time.

"I think the band's breaking up," he whispered, shoving his face into his hands.

•~•~•~•~•

It's true. A few weeks after that night the band did decide to split. Ryan and Jon left because of some 'musical differences'. And Brendon and Spencer tried continuing as a two-man group. But after that year, everything seemed to have changed so much more than it did before.

Jon and Cassie finally got married, and are hoping to have children some day. He's also continuing a new band with Ryan.

Spencer is still coping with losing his best friend over the split, but they still talk here and there. He's also been putting more effort into the lyrics. And now he even has a girlfriend.

Ryan and Jess are still together from what I know. A few problems sometimes, but they always get through it.

Though the two separate bands don't talk much anymore, Jess and I are still constantly in touch. It's weird, since I'd always go visit her, and I'd always get those airy "How's Panic doing" questions from Ryan.

You can tell they all miss each other. We all miss each other. But with all the shit we've been out through, and with all the problems shoved in our faces, we've done pretty damn well. And hell, maybe Brendon and I won't be together forever like we want to. Maybe something will tear us apart. Maybe Jess and Ryan do split. Maybe Jess and I stop talking. Maybe the bands both split permanently. But all in all, I'm pretty fucking happy with my life right now. Just here, sitting with Brendon, sharing memories about how screwed our lives were in the first place.

But guess what?

Change happens.

And no matter how bad it may be at first,

Something beautiful always comes out of it.

•~•~•~•~•

(A/N: The End?!1?! Yes, yes it is. Thanks omfg you guys. Okay. Wow ily all. Especially Jessy bc you've helped me write this fic since the near-beginning. And gah okay thanks again so much guys)