Neophyte

Rosary

Metztli felt happiness, excitement, and worry. It left her unsure which emotion to feel, since so much had happened in one day. Guillermo knew the truth; Valentina learned that Victoriano wanted to marry her off; and Esteban expressed his feelings and proposed to her. Her face turned warm as she remembered the kiss they shared. 

It was her first kiss that had meaning and emotion. She giggled at the memory. 

Metztli was in the kitchen helping the women cook since they were understaffed. She didn't mind since it would mean less stress from having many watchful eyes. The women in the kitchen asked about Mariana's whereabouts, while others noticed that Guillermo wasn't himself. They were reassured that Mariana was okay but wasn't feeling too well. "Guillermo was probably worried," was what Metztli would answer. The women believed her and decided not to press further. 

Finished cooking, Metztli put plates of food and cups of tea for herself and Mariana. She didn't know if Valentina would be in her room. Mariana needed more of her support since everything was going downhill. Arriving outside Mariana's room, Metztli gently opened the door, letting herself inside. Mariana sat on her bed, her face slightly red from crying. "I brought food and more tea for you. Are you feeling a bit better?" she asked while closing the door behind her.

Mariana kept on looking at the fireplace. "My soul is still in pain, child. It is pain for seeing my  children in pain all because of my decisions."

"Oh Mariana. Victoriano was the one who wanted you not to tell your children the truth about him. He-"

"Victoriano is not the only one to blame. I also agreed to pursue his ideas, even though I didn't fully agree with them. I was young and foolish. I would rather us live poor than live in such a lie. My children became educated but I finally see that they would never be accepted by these devils." Metztli motioned for her a plate of food and a cup of tea, but she shook her head. 

There was a hint of venom in Mariana's tone. When first met, Metztli was a pacifist, striving to live in harmony with the Padres. Now, she spoke with distrust and exhaustion. Metztli felt helpless. "What's done is done, Mariana. Neither you nor Victoriano can change the past, but you can change the present and the future. Guillermo finally knows the truth, but Valentina must know it too. I know you're afraid that your children may hate you both, but those feelings will eventually pass. They were lied to, and it's only common sense that they will have certain feelings. Time will heal, and acceptance will happen."

Looking down at her hands, she knew Metztli had tried to reassure her that time would heal her children, but her heart told her otherwise. For the first time, Mariana wasn't sure if her children would ever forgive her and their father. She loved her children dearly, and it would kill her if they ever came to hate her and Victoriano. Her thoughts were interrupted when Metztli gently held her hands. "You're filled with doubt, and it's okay to feel that way. Have faith in your children. They are strong, and they will forgive you both. Now, eat and drink up. You need to keep your energy for tomorrow." 

Mariana couldn't help but feel hope; Metztli's warm hands brought her warmth. She gently touched Metztli's face, thanking her. "I do not know why, but whenever I am close to you, I feel a pull toward you. It is as if you were one of my own children."

Metztli smiled while looking at Mariana's wooden rosary. "The rosary, Victoriano, gave it to you."

"Yes, he did. He once told me that it had always given him strength to survive and he gave it to me. To give me strength to protect our children." Mariana looked at the rosary, clenched, and took it off. "I am giving it to you."

"What? You're giving it to me?"

"Yes, I remember you said that you lost your own. I want to give it to you." Mariana motioned the rosary to Metztli, who gently held onto it. "You need it more than I do, and it is my gift to you."

"Mariana..." Metztli held the rosary that held so much meaning. The rosary she carried in her era held her faith, but after witnessing the horrors her people suffered, she no longer knew if she wanted it back. "I...don't know if I have faith in god anymore."

Holding Metztli's hands, Mariana said, "We lose our faith from time to time. It is natural. I will not try to convince you to believe in god, but you can put your faith in yourself and our people in this. Please keep it."

Metztli thought that holding the rosary would bring her some closure; it didn't. All she felt was heartbreak and pain. She felt Mariana and Victoriano's pain in the rosary. "They been through so much; I'll keep it for now." Metztli put on the rosary on her neck and looked at Mariana, "Thank you Mariana. I promise to take care of it. Oh and before I forget. I wanted to tell you that I accepted Esteban's proposal."

"Y-You did? I thought that you would refuse until death." 

"I thought I would do so, too. However, Esteban...kissed me, showing me how he feels."

"Oh my! Bless that man's heart and soul! This is such wonderful news! Does Victoriano know about this?"

"Esteban told me that he would inform him. I still can't believe I accepted."

Mariana felt happiness and hope. Seeing Metztli smile reminded her of her youth. She, too, had many dreams, especially when Victoriano saved her. Although she couldn't make her dreams a reality, she was happy to see her dreams live on within Metztli. "Your news has brightened me, child. I am certain that Victoriano will want to wed you both after the trial."

The mention of the trial made Metztli's skin crawl. She almost forgot about Federico, but since his trial was tomorrow, his actions would be known. There was a possibility that she would have to testify against him. Seeing him made her skin crawl, but Metztli was determined to demand justice for what he had done to those he hurt. "Yeah, I hope that tomorrow, it will put an end to this nightmare."

"Yes, dear child. I hope that tomorrow will be Federico's end. Now, go and rest. Tomorrow, we have a day ahead of us."