Neophyte

Last Resort

Metztli was returned to her prison cell and was thrown on the floor on her stomach. Her leg was chained again; the Soldados left the prison.

Alone, Metztli was slowly waking up, but her vision was blurry. Her back was painfully sore, and pain traveled throughout her body. It was difficult to move due to the pain. Tears dripped from her eyes; Metztli never imagined feeling excruciating pain in her entire life. She only received six lashes, but Anna Maria, Juvencio, and many of her people suffered more than she did. 

It was difficult for her to imagine how much suffering they endured more than she did. Many have died due to the severity of the punishments. Getting the lashes of the whip was dehumanizing; it made one feel less than cattle. 

It was where one's humanity was taken.

Metztli couldn't contain her tears; she silently cried. She was exhausted from being strong, but when singing, she felt her power return to her. Her singing brought her people strength. When yelling that her death would be her freedom, her people pleaded for her mercy. 

Slowly sitting up, Metztli couldn't forget the echoes of their pleading for her. They didn't do it for Anna Maria, Juvencio, or others who suffered the same fate. 

Metztli felt the wounds on her back; parts of her skin were opened. Her blood slowly dripped down. If the wound weren't tended, then there would be a possibility of infection. If she got an infection, then she could die. 

A sigh escaped her lips, but then the door opened again. Metztli didn't bother to look to see who it was. She didn't have much strength.

"Metztli..."

Closing her eyes and putting herself closer to the wall, she felt her blood dripping on her back. "No...not you..."

"Yes, it is I. I-I had to see you after what I have witnessed."

Metztli refused to see him. She almost found it difficult to believe that Federico would have the audacity to visit her after her lashing. Her body was so exhausted, and her brain was still trying to keep her awake. "Leave me alone."

Federico knelt in front of the prison bars. He was close to her but felt so far. Seeing Metztli's blood slowly dripping from her wounds made his soul break. The memory of the whip landing on her back made him insane with despair. He told himself that he would rather have her dead than be with another man, but since she was no longer with Esteban and seeing her in terrible condition, it made him feel despair. "I-I know I was the cause of your pain. I despise myself to the point of wanting to take my life."

Metztli didn't react; she refused to look at him. Hearing him speak with sincerity and obsession made her wish that she were dead, so not to hear him. "Esteban..."

"What?"

"Esteban, my husband."

Listening to her speak of Esteban made Federico feel enraged and jealous. Though she must have been in utter pain, Metztli, in his mind, dared to speak of Esteban. "You speak of him, even after all your pain? Even as I express my pain for you?"

"Esteban, mi amor (my love)."

Federico bit his lower lip so hard that blood slowly dripped. "Stop speaking his name! Enough! Must you still torment me!? Do you know how torturous for me to see you suffer the whip!? Before your punishment, I punished myself as I gave myself the whip! I wanted to share your suffering! Look!" Federico slowly undid his habit, took it off to the point he was only in his undergarments. He turned around, where his back faced Metztli. "This is what I have done to myself! I have done this for you!"

Metztli took a glance at Federico, where she saw his back filled with whip lashes. His back had wounds that weren't too deep; dried blood was imminent. She shook her head and returned to ignoring him. "Creep," she thought. 

Realizing that Metztli continued to remain silent, Federico dressed himself again, returning to face her. "You speak nothing."

"I have nothing else to say to you. You think that what you did to yourself would ever make me feel pity for you?" Metztli let out a humorless chuckle. "You are delusional. I will never pity or think of being with a deplorable coward. I would rather die. Now leave me alone, monster."

Federico's eyes widened, his lips trembled as he felt his heart shatter into pieces. He slowly stood up, walked to the door, and opened it. He took another glance at Metztli, who sat motionless, not giving him a mere glance. Federico closed the door behind him as he slowly walked away from the prison. His mind was a blur.

Metztli destroyed his heart, mind, and spirit. He never wanted her to get hurt; he didn't expect her to get too bold. Federico showed her his despair and guilt for being a part of her suffering. He whipped himself to share her suffering.

Metztli didn't care.

She called Esteban's name.

Also, it was going to be a matter of time until he was sent to another Mission. He prolonged his stay due to the fear of a rebellion. There was a possibility that a rebellion wasn't going to happen and that Metztli wasn't going to speak. 

He would be caught in his lie. Everything he did was to get to Metztli; Federico refused to let everything he went through and sacrificed be for nothing. There was one more thing he had on his sleeve.

The plan had risks, but since Metztli was imprisoned, his plan might work. "I need to speak with Padre Fermin. I know that he will accept my plan."