I thought I was a planet?

Mars

Nearly ten years had passed since the Dursleys had woken up to find their nephew on the front s-

What are you doing?

Why are you staring at paper?

Mars sighed before closing his book for the third time in the past five minutes. He tried to watch something on his phone, couldn't do that. He tried to play a game, he died three times in one minute. And now! he can't even read a book because his head is feeling like an asteroid field.

"I'm reading," He replied, monotone.

What's reading?

What are the squiggles?

Mars got up to put the book back on the shelf, it was clear reading was impossible.

Mars, You locked us outside the door

"I'm opening it," he said but he didn't deny that he knew they were outside.

Two bundles of fur ran into the room and immediately knocked over the standing lamp.

Sorry!

The dogs then settled down into their beds in the top right corner of the room, near his desk.

It's soft

Is it ours?

Why's it red

Is it because we're red?

Mars loved Phobos and Deimos but having them in his head was torture, possibly almost as bad as the asteroid strike.

"PLANETS! DOWNSTAIRS NOW!"

That was probably the Sun or Helios or his uncle, Mars should pick one: Helios; too professional, Uncle; too casual, the Sun; he didn't even go by that name.

"HURRY UP, EVERYONE!"

Are we in trouble?

No, I think it was someone else

Who do you think it was?

Mars began leaving the bedroom while the conversation continued.

Maybe it was Earth

He changed, it could be Venus

"Mars, are you okay?" Mars looked to his left, and Mercury was there, "You're frowning and look like you have a planet-ache, sorry headache."

Mars smiled, "Yeah, Phobos and Deimos are just talking in my head, right now they're wondering about human laws."

"That must be irritating," replied Mercury as they entered the living room, "Couldn't they just talk to each other in their own heads?"

"I could ask them," Mars suggested while metaphorically slamming his head against a wall, "Phobos? Deimos?"

Yeah

What's going on?

"Could you talk to each other in each other's head?" Mars asked, and then waited a few minutes, "Phobos? Deimos?"

Yeah?

We thought you wanted us to speak in our own heads

They could have done that the whole time? THEY COULD HAVE DONE THAT THE WHOLE DAMN TIME?!

Forgot metaphorically, Mars slammed his head against a wall.