Queen of Chaos

Red.

Several days later Billy and I are on the way back to the crew bunks; I am basically skipping between cars, the smell of animals on my skin and a small smile on my face. “Are you hungry?” I nod and blow my bangs out of my face. “Come on, we will go to the kitchen cars.” His fluid way of moving is beginning to be comforting and his biting remarks are becoming less frequent. “Stop walking like that. You are so obviously a girl when you sway your hips like that.” Briskly I nod and try to imitate his confident walk. 

As we are a couple cars down an ear splitting screech echoes through the line of cars. Then there is a whirlwind as something comes speeding towards us. “Hey Billy.” There is a girl. About a year younger than I and ten times as pretty, with long flowing blonde hair and huge blue eyes. “I have been looking all over for you.” She steps closer and looks up at Billy, his tall frame towering over her petite one. “I haven’t seen you since my last show.”

Suddenly I feel uncomfortable as if all of the bonding Billy and I have just gained is gone, gone, gone. Hoping to go unnoticed I walk around the beautiful girl and continue towards the front of the train. I succeed. Neither of them says a word and I hurry along without looking back, back, back. “Hey, Ace!” I glance up from the toes of my boots and meet familiar brown eyes that are twinkling in the sunlight. “Where ‘ave ya been! I have been lookin’ everywhere for ya.” 

With a nod I walk around Tommy and continue in my search for food. “Ya doin’ alright?” Again I nod and then sniff the air for traces of food. “Did Billy and ya get along alright?” I nod once more and then hurry, hoping silently that I can lose him. He opens his mouth and then closes it again, continues walking beside me. When I reach the kitchen cars I know almost immediately by the delicious smell that reaches my nose. There are tons of people packed into the span of three large train cars.

It takes everything within me not to stare at the wide variety of people sitting around, talking casually. Keeping my eyes glued to my boots I get in the back of the food line and scratch behind my ear. “So you gonna tell me what is wrong?” My shoulders hunch as I feel a couple sets of eyes on me; my boots shuffle forward with the line. “Ace…” Stupidly, I glance back at Tommy and nearly go weak in the knees at the puppy dog expression he is giving me.

Then I see two people come into the car from behind him. Its Billy and that girl; I swing around the other way so quickly I nearly fall on my face; Tommy’s hand rests on my arm and I hunch my shoulders further. “Ace, come on. Tell me what is wrong.” A bowl is shoved into my hands and then a guy with six fingers on each hand ladles some soup into the bowl. I mumble a thank you and grab a roll from the pile. Humming to myself I start towards the car door and run smack into something.

“Where do you think you are going?” No…please let it not be him. Hesitantly, I raise my eyes up and see Billy, the girl attached to his arm. Tommy comes and rests a hand on my shoulder gently, the smile he gives me is warm. Suddenly, it doesn’t matter that Billy and I aren’t friends or even acquaintances. There are about forty guys on this train, I will find friendship elsewhere. Fearlessly I meet Billy’s brooding grey eyes and cock my head to the side in the manner I know he despises.

“I am just tryin to get to an empty car, man.” Billy’s eyes narrow first on me and then on Tommy. “If you could move.” My voice is husky, nearly unrecognizable and I can feel the girl looking me up and down. Billy steps to one side and I smirk at him. “Thanks, man.” I punch his shoulder harder than necessary and step on his foot on the way past him. When I reach a car that is empty I sit and rest my bowl of soup carefully on my lap. “Hey.”

Tommy is watching me curiously, his mouth slightly slack as he sits beside me. “That was impressive.” I raise an eyebrow and sip at my scolding hot soup. “The way ya weren’t scared of Billy o’ nothin’.” With a nod I continue sipping my soup and turn to look out the open car door at the flashes, flashes, flashes. The bread is delicious and soft, soft, soft. Something brushes my hand and I nearly spill my soup all over myself. My eyes glance down to see Tommy’s calloused and large hand covering my small one.

His other hand reaches up and pulls the cap from my head; the wind, wind, wind captures my hair and the wild tendrils fall and brush my shoulders. “Even with tha dirt on ya face yar still nice lookin.” Red, red, red are my cheeks as I hesitantly meet his brown eyes. “An’ all er tha’ hair.” Everything in me hurtles forward with the moving train and I have to pull my hand from his, his, his; I have to, before it is to late, late, late. I return my hat to my head, finish my soup and bread and then blow my bangs from my face.

“Urm thanks I guess.” The car door slams open from the left and I hurriedly tuck my hair up into my hat. The thump of someone jumping into the car sounds and I put some distance between Tommy and myself. When I glance up I expect to see Billy…not the most attractive man in the world. I choke on my air and let out an embarrassing wheezing sound. He is dressed from head to toe in red, from the well fitting red suit to the leather shoes on his feet. 

Red, red, red to match my cheeks as I stare at him worrying how my hair looks and if I have anything between my teeth. His cold, depthless eyes the color of white sea foam barely skip over me on their journey towards Tommy. “Thomas. I have been looking all over for you. Madame Dejavu needs help in her car…” he trails off, his eyes suddenly locking on me. “Who is the girl?” My heart stutters to a halt and Tommy looks at me with panic in his eyes and fear in his jaw.