Cowboys and Angels

Chapter 2

I gasped and stepped back, stumbling. I didn't know where to look; he was my only view. I wanted to run, but I didn't want to look like a coward. Talk about bad timing. "Uh, um. Uh." I stuttered.

"Cat got your tongue, honey?" he spat. I glared at him. Where the hell were the boys when I need them?

"No, but you best be moving before I kick your ass all the way to hell," I shot back. I glared at him once more with my piercing eyes. Everyone always hated my glare. Not me...just my glare. But Trevor wasn't scared. He didn't care. To see me fall apart or break down in front him is a dream to him. I couldn't let him get to me. That was the one thing that I couldn't let anyone do, is get to me. I'm strong. 

He grabbed my wrist so tightly, I felt is short stubby nails dig into my skin. I gritted my teeth; he snorted. "Ha, you poor thing. I hope you have that letter plastered in your mind for the rest of your life." 

His grip became tighter and tighter. I became more and more helpless and weak. He pushed me up against the school's brick exterior. He leaned in so closer to my ear that I felt his hot breath on my ear. In a fierce voice, he began, "You know I loved you. You just decided to throw a pissy fit. You turned your back on me, remember? I never lost faith in you. Because you did that, I hate you. I hate everything about you. You hurt me. Eye for an eye. Tooth for a tooth, darlin'." He shoved himself off me. I whimpered at the stinging pain in my wrist and now my back. He smirked as he backed away.

I could slowly feel myself giving in. I could slowly feel giving myself up and going back to him. No, Emerson. No. This isn't your fault. Don't give in. You're strong. Trevor just wants to make you feel like shit. He hurt you. He scarred you. You're an angel. I clearly listened to my conceited thoughts. Compared to him, I was an angel. And he was the devil. I needed to stay strong. But...what if it was my fault? Maybe, I was too hot tempered. Stop, you're giving in!, I screamed at myself. I slid down the brick wall exterior of the school and pulled my knees up to my chest. I leaned my head back and breathed deeply. I could feel myself fall asleep...

*Flashback*

I walked up Trevor's truck, hopping in. After settling in, I called Trevor up and asked him why he's so late even though he was just inside. I laughed at his laugh. It was so beautiful. He always made me smile. I loved him with everything I had in me. After a few minutes, we both hung up. He said he'd be about five minutes longer. I told him I had just enough patience to wait. I'd wait for him. I started to become curious, because I had never been left alone in his truck. To my notice, I saw a white, neatly fold paper on the driver's seat. Maybe it was my curiousity that got the best of me, but I began to read it. I think the first line caught me extremely off guard. My heart started pounding. 

Hey, baby. Who was calling him 'baby?' I kept reading.

I miss you so much, Trevor. I know this is the first letter I'm sending you. I just haven't had the time. I've been thinking a lot about you the last few months. That summer was literally the best summer ever. I'm glad you told her about that "vacation" you were going on, just to see me. I know it must hurt lying to her, but it's for the best and the best is us. I love you. My siblings miss you. So does my momma and daddy. You and daddy seemed to have gotten along really well. You mean everything to me. The fact we've been best friends since square one is amazing and now. Now we are the best something out there. You are just amazing. I miss your kisses. Long distance will work. I know it will. Because we are so strong and perfect together. I can't wait to see you soon. But I just want to say, you should probably...you know...end it with her. Lying isn't going to do you or her any good if she finds out on her own. I love you and I know you are strong. I really really REALLY hope to see you soon, baby. I love you so much, Trevor. Forever and always, Kerry.

By this time, I was sobbing. I was hypervenaliting. I was on the verge of screaming my lungs out. I jumped out of his truck and started running...with the letter in hand. I could hear him, clearly, talking to himself but to me, "I wore this tshirt just for you." Until he finally realized I was running away from him, he yelled, "Woah, woah! Emerson!" and started running after me. I turned around and faced him. I walked backwards so weakly. I held up the letter so he could see. He stopped and slowly articulated, "Emerson..."

"What do you fucking expect me to say?" I shouted. "It's okay, Trevor! I don't fucking care you were cheating on me, or that our whole relationship was a lie. I still love you. Because," I looked down at the letter, tears filling the page, and read, "the fact that we've been best friends since square one is amazing. We are forever and always!" I continued to sob and think about the many months we were together.

I loved everything about us. We were the definitely of a beautiful couple...until now. I didn't know what to do. My mind ran in all directions and I felt like dying. I felt like giving up on life and running away. Forever and always.

I fell to my knees on the dirt and threw my head in my hands. My sobs were loud and almost deafing. I probably had mascara dripping down my face. Once again, I looked up at Trevor who was standing a good ten or fifteen feet away. I yelled, "Why are you evenwatching me cry? Is this what fuels your fire now?"

"Why did you read that letter, Emerson?" he asked in the softest voice, barely audiable, but loud enough for me to hear.

"I was sitting in your truck. What was I supposed to do? Sit there like a dog until you got here?" I began calming down but I was still upset beyond anything. My chest was so heavy. I felt like I was caving in. 

"Em, you weren't supposed to read that." 

"We'll, I'm glad I did! It saves you the trouble of telling me we have to break up because of this girlfriend you have, you fucking liar!" Nope, the waterworks started again. 

"I love you. Let me explain!"

"You have nothing to explain. We are done. I wish you were dead. No, no. I wish I was dead. You can have your happy ending with her. Bye, Trevor."

And with that I walked away. And after that, Trevor was my worst nightmare. Whenever he came around, I cowered in fear. I was scared he'd kill me. I was scared of him. 

*Present*

I woke up because of someone shaking me. I freaked and punched them right in the face. 

"Shit, Emerson!" It was Brett. He was rubbing his jaw. "Wake up."

"I'm clearly awake, aren't I?" I asked. He nodded, still rubbing his jaw. "Sorry 'bout that. I thought you were Trevor." I rubbed the back of my neck.

"It's all good, girly. Lemme get you home. You look terrible. Why were you out here anyways? You never skip school." He stated walking me to his dad's utility truck. Brett squinted his eyes in the sun, then put on his sunglasses that were hooked on his shirt.

I laughed, "I've skipped school before, but I was just...I don't know...done, I guess."

"Done with what?" he asked.

"Everything. At the time, you. But now, it's Trevor." I jogged over to the passenger side door and opened it. I waited until he caught up. When he did, he immediately got in and slammed the door shut. And then, did I.

"Are you still hungover that idiot?" he questioned. I shrugged and sat there.

"Emerson, I'm gunna tell you somethin'. I was once hungover a girl-" 

"You?" I asked in surpise and slight sarcasm.

"Yeah, me. Well, I was. And I probably did the worst thing. I started goin' around and hookin' up with girls so I wouldn't think about her. And eventually, I got her off my mind." he said so easily.

"So...you're saying I should go around and hook up with guys to stop him from getting to me?" I wonder.

"NO! No! Don't! I'm saying. Don't be like me. But do something, anything, to stop thinking about him or letting him get to you." Before I knew it, he cupped my chin with one hand and rubbed his thumb over cheek. Butterflies danced in my stomach. I felt my face flush. I gave him a half smile. "You're too precious to let someone like Trevor tear you down like that." He smiled wildly. That was probably the sweetest thing I've heard. He started to move closer to me. A million thoughts ran through my mind. He's gunna kiss me. He's really gunna kiss me.