The Virgin

Chapter Six - To Brazil and Back

"And then he asked me if I had any conditions," I yell to Lacy from the shower.

"You should have sex with him. He seems game."

I push open the shower door and stare at her the best I can with soap dripping into my eyes.

"I don't date co-workers!"

"Don't date him, just screw him," she says shooting me a look of "duh."

I retreat back under the hot water. She's not going to give up on this without a fight. I'm going to have to go into the only thing Lacy understands. It's time for full-on whine mode.

"I know this seems lame," I complain, grabbing my towel and drying off. "But I don't think I can prep for a major surgery and think about having sex at the same time. My mind has already begun melting, so we need to put the "having sex" thing on the back burner. I need to focus."

I bend over and wrap my freshly-cleaned hair in the towel. "Damn it, he was right, this shampoo does smell amazing."

I grab the expensive bottle of delight and toss it into the trash can. I need all the help I can get.

"Listen to me," Lacy starts in while retrieving the shampoo from the trashcan and shoving it into her toiletry bag. "From what I can tell, you've been training for this surgery your entire life. Your patient is lucky to have you. You've got this. All of it. Even the having sex for the first time part."

She's making me feel better about the surgery, but I'm still on the fence about the other thing. I take off my towel and quickly grab for my robe.

"Whoa, what exactly is going on down there?" Lacy says, pointing to my crotch. "Are you growing that out or what?"

I pull my robe tightly around me. "If you're referring to my pubic area . . . " I say with utter disdain.

"I'm referring to your bushy vag," Lacy interrupts. "It's buried somewhere beneath a deeply wooded forest. Someone get the lumberjacks in here!" she yells to an invisible group of men in flannels.

"What are you, ten?"

"You're clearly not," she says, not willing to let this go.

"Let me see yours," I demand, naively expecting some kind of reciprocation.

"Oh yeah? You want to see mine? I've played this game before."

Lacy drops her pants and pistol-points with both hands to her completely bare vagina.

"First off, where's your underwear?" I ask, trying to not seem thrown by my sisters vaginal pride.

"Panties cause panty lines. I don't like either."

"Fine, and where are your pubic hairs? Because you actually could be mistaken for a ten-year-old."

"They're gone. What's left is just a nice smooth surface for all kinds of recreation."

With this, she turns and shakes her naked butt at me.

"I like being an adult woman. I earned these hairs," I proclaim, while combing my fantastic-smelling hair.

Lacy pulls up her pants and goes back to applying her third coat of mascara.

"If we're going to bring you up to sex goddess speed in two weeks, you're going to have to start with shedding the wool blanket that's shielding your va-jay-jay and half your thigh from the light of day."

"Really? Half my thigh?"

Lacy gives me a sideways glance implying that she said what she said, and she isn't taking it back.