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3 MONTHS AGO. 𝘔𝘐𝘊𝘏𝘐𝘎𝘈𝘕.
That night Khalil got shot changed everything.
Not just for Khalil.
For me too.
The waiting room, the blood, his mama crying, everybody looking scared as hell pretending they wasn't. I think something in me shifted the second that nurse walked in and said he made it. It's like I finally was able to breathe again, but the breath didn't feel the same. It felt heavier.
Like it came with something attached to it.
Guilt maybe.
Fear definitely.
Or maybe it was just the realization that I really could lose him. For real. Not on some dramatic "I'm done with you" type of time. Not on some we arguing and not speaking type of time. I mean really lose him.
Days later he was finally moved out of ICU and into a regular room. Everybody was acting like that meant things were back normal, but I knew better. Nothing about any of this was normal. He got shot. He almost died. Ain't shit normal about that.
I had stopped by the gift shop before going to see him. I got him some snacks he probably wouldn't even be able to eat yet, a blue Gatorade, and a stupid little balloon that said GET WELL SOON. I don't know why I got the balloon. It just felt like something you do when somebody in the hospital.
When I made it upstairs to his floor, Khalil's mama was coming out of the room.
"There she go." She said the second she saw me and gave me a tired smile. She looked better than she did that first night but only by a little. "He been asking for you."
My stomach flipped.
"For me?" I repeated.
"Yes girl. Go in there. Maybe you'll make him stop complaining." She rolled her eyes and I laughed softly.
"He complaining already?"
"He been complaining since he woke up. That's how I know he gone be alright." She said and that made me smile for real. "I'm finna go get something to eat. You staying?"
"I can."
"Good. Don't let him get on your nerves too bad."
"No promises." I joked and she laughed before walking off down the hallway.
I stood outside the room for a second before taking a breath and pushing the door open.
