There have been points in my life after the incident where I have wonder who I was going to become. As I grew older I understood what happened when I was eight. I was molested. I didn't tell anyone about it until I reached my sophomore year of high school. Through the years between I was a popular girl putting on fake smiles, going to parties and flirted with hot guys. After a while I found that it would never make me fully happy. I would always wake up wondering what I was doing with my life.
During my freshman year I cut off all ties with my friends. I was a popular girl going through changes. I had a hot jock as a boyfriend and thought he was the one. At first he acted like a gentleman throughout the relationship, but as the months passed by he started getting abusive. I couldn't leave him because I thought he was the guy I'd see waiting down the aisle in the next couple of years. I thought that maybe, just maybe, it was a phase and if I stuck with him through that he would eventually change for the better.
I was wrong.
Things got worse and worse. After I gave him my virginity on my birthday and later finding out after a defective condom got me pregnant, I was stressed. I later lost the baby due to the stress and abuse I was receiving. I never told anyone about the baby. How could I, when I felt almost completely alone, even when surrounded by plenty of people. He raped me a couple of times, claiming that it was my fault for sleeping at his house. After what seemed like forever, he broke up with me leaving me broken.
The cold slap of reality didn't seem to get enough and later my grandmother, who I was extremely close to, died. I was a mess. My so called friends at the time offered me weed and thinking it was my only way out, I took it. While taking it my so called friends took pictures posting it on Instagram and Facebook and I lost trust in my friends and family. I was alone in a cold world with nothing but broken pieces of my used to be perfect life.
It was at one point I got frustrated thinking about the past and gave myself a make over. I changed schools and met Emma. She later introduced me to Luke, who took a while for me to trust. I've told them pieces of why I'm afraid of guys, but they don't know the complete story, I don't think anyone ever will. Emma has been encouraging me to step outside of my shell that I've created by giving me random make overs once in a while, but when ever I approach a guy without my glasses I get nervous and start out in a cold sweat. This is why I ran from Josh. Even if I wanted to know him, it's hard to open up. I've gone through a lot of heart break and I don't want to be hurt again.
~~~~~~~~~
" Hey mom I'm home!" I say walking into the house and taking off Emma's shoes. It's taken a while but my mom has learned to trust me at least more than before. I know she'll never fully trust me, but she's trying to.
" Hey! I just finished making dinner." She yells from the kitchen. I walk into the kitchen and can smell the chicken she fried up. She turned around and saw me dressed up.
"Emma gave you another make over huh?" She says giving me a plate of food. I can hear the slight disapproval in her voice. I know she's worried that I'll go back to how I was.
I nod and then sit down at the breakfast bar. We sat there quietly munching on food. Once I'm done I place my dish in the dishwasher and head to my room.
I call Emma and wait as it rings,
"Hello Cher!" Emma says wasting no time for me to reply, "How did it go or did you just skip it all together? I know that you do that sometimes, just saying. You better of not chickened out this time."
"Josh saw." I reply hiding the emotions in my voice.
"What? How? Are you okay? I'm so sorry Cher!" She says voice full of worry.
"I don't know how he ended up in the building, but he heard me singing. I don't think he recognized me because he asked for my name. I ran away and jumped on Luke. He helped me get to my car and shooed away Josh." I finished
"Okay, well, be careful tomorrow." She said and hung up after saying goodbye.
After i completed my homework, I flopped onto my bed and settled down for a deep sleep.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Short I know, but I'd rather break it up more so that I can update faster and give myself time to think. Anyway comment, vote, or follow c:
YOU ARE READING
Last Song
ספרות נוערCher is an outcast of the social circle in her school. After being at the top of the social ladder, hooking up with a jock, and having her heart crushed, she went through a total change. Now Cher wears baggy clothing that makes her look fat, big gla...
