Unspoken

Chapter 30

November 19, 1992

John woke up early the next morning to find Alais standing beside the bed staring at him curiously. Marlena was deeply asleep. Her head was on his shoulder, and her hand was on his bare chest. It was the best sleep he'd had since the last time he'd shared Marlena's bed. Shifting Marlena to the side, he couldn't help smiling when she protested. He sat up, and rubbed his hands over his face.

"You're in mommy's bed," Alais said.

"I am," he replied, getting up slowly. He reached for his daughter's hand, leading her towards the bedroom door. "And she's tired, so why don't we go make pancakes, and let her sleep."

"How come you aren't sleeping on the couch?" she asked. "You're usually on the couch."

"It makes my back hurt," he said. "And sometimes I have bad dreams."

"Oh. Okay." She was quiet as John led her towards the kitchen. When they got there she said, "I have bad dreams sometimes. They make me cry."

He knelt down in front of her. "You know, if that ever happens you can come and get me or mommy."

She smiled. "And then I can sleep in her bed like you do?"

"If you need to," he told her. "I just want you to know that we love you, and if you need us we'll be there."

John stood up, and went to get the pancake mix from the cabinet. Taking down a bowl, he asked Alais, "Have you ever made pancakes?"

"No," she said. "I read about pancakes in my book... but I don't have that book no more."

"Perhaps we could find it again," he said. "I could help you. We could go to a bookstore, or maybe the library."

"I like books," she said, climbing onto the chair he'd pulled over to the counter. Her eyes followed him as he moved easily making a breakfast he'd made a hundred times before.

"Sami likes pancakes with chocolate chips, but Eric usually likes them with bananas," John said. He leaned down as if he were whispering a secret, and then he said, "I like both."

Alais giggled, "Chocolate and bananas?"

He smiled. "Call me a glutton, but that's the best way."

"What's a glutton?" she asked.

"Someone who wants too much, I think." He started stirring the pancake batter as a skillet heated on the stove. "I can't choose just one, so I want them both." He thought about his love for Isabella and his simultaneous love for Marlena. Did that make him greedy? Or was that something he had no control over?

"What's going on in here?" Marlena asked from the doorway.

Alais smiled at her mother, saying, "Daddy's teaching me pancakes! He's a glutton!"

Marlena laughed. "Is that what he told you?"

She nodded, and then asked, "Do you like pancakes?"

"I love pancakes... especially when your daddy makes them." She entered the kitchen, and he watched her move towards the coffee maker, just as the front door to the cabin opened, and Carrie was carried in on a gust of winter air.

"You're awake!" she said excitedly. "Guess what? Grandma and grandpa spoke with Jesse, and he can come too! He can help grandpa and dad on the ranch, and go to school here too."

John watched Marlena think for a moment, and then she said, "I wasn't aware that you felt more for him."

Carrie seemed to blush slightly. "Well, I don't know how I feel... not exactly, but I–I think he deserves a chance to get out of Salem, and I think that maybe... he might want that chance."