Unspoken

Chapter 3

She felt the length of his body against her, the coarse hair of his legs, as their bodies moved together. His hands pushed over her hips roughly, twisting in the satin fabric of her nightgown, and pulling it up to expose her long legs. Lips sucked at the skin of her collarbone, causing erotic shivers to make her body tremble, and Marlena was overcome with want. Roman had never been this way before, this needy, this aggressive. Maybe they could get back the love they once shared. Maybe all wasn't lost. Her fingers went to thread through his hair, and she realized the texture wasn't right, but then he bit at her neck, licking over the stinging skin with a long swipe of his tongue, "Oh, G-d!" she cried out, bucking her lace clad hips towards him. She could feel how aroused he was.

Using his hand to cup her mound and squeeze it, she heard him say, "You want me, Doc. I know you do. Just as much as I want you."

It was John. It wasn't Roman. She pulled back quickly, staring into his deep indigo blue eyes, still breathing heavy from arousal, "John? How did you—"

"Does it matter, Doc? I need you..."

Marlena came awake so suddenly, she thought she might fall from the bed. Her breathing was erratic, and her center was throbbing with want. She knew she had to calm down. It was just a dream, but it was an unsettling dream. John's wife was dying of cancer, and this wasn't the time for her to start reliving her old feelings for him. But then she asked herself, "Are they really old?" Or might those feelings simply have been buried so deep because of their circumstances? She had pushed them down so far, that she'd felt they were gone, because feeling them hurt too much. Especially once John was married, and Brady was born.

When she had gone to John's loft to speak with Isabella a few days earlier, she'd seen Brady in his play pen, and when his eyes had locked on her, it took her breath for one quick moment. She'd been moving across the room one second, and completely immobile the next. Everything about Brady's features was similar to Isabella, but his countenance was all John. The steady way his eyes held onto her...she'd felt John for a moment, but she'd forced herself to shake it off, and focus on why she was there.

Marlena glanced at the clock, realizing she might as well get out of bed, since her alarm was scheduled to go off in less than twenty minutes anyway. The pounding of the water in the shower, signaled that Roman was getting ready to go to work...or that he'd just gotten home. Marlena never knew. It seemed as if Roman was always at work. He didn't offer any reason, and she didn't ask for any. His work had taken over their lives, leaving little room left for trying to figure out exactly what was wrong in their relationship. He had started taking evening shifts and weekend shifts. They barely saw each other. Marlena could barely stand being in her own home, because Roman was never there and Sami and Eric were gone.

When the twins had said they wanted to go to private school in Colorado, Marlena and Roman had agreed. Although Marlena never said it out loud, she felt like the twins were mourning John...and hiding from Roman. She spoke with them over the telephone almost daily, and they could spend an hour telling her about their day or something that Grandma Martha or Grandpa Frank had done. They never asked about Roman. Marlena wasn't even sure if they ever spoke to Roman.

She heard the shower water turn off, and she rolled over in the bed, closing her eyes, and pretending to sleep. She didn't want to think too deeply about why she was feigning sleep in that moment, but she continued to do so, as Roman exited the bathroom.

The telephone rang and Roman snatched it up quickly. Speaking quietly, because he thought Marlena was still asleep, he said, "Brady residence..." She heard him pause for a lengthy period of time before he hissed into the phone, "I told you not to call me at home...no...I'll see you later..." and he hung up, finished getting dressed for work and left.